random thoughts – Day 1,262 – (Thursday) – music night

I had comped tickets to the Lowell Music Series, which landed in my possession after my friends and I had already bought our Lyle Lovett tickets. The complimentary tickets sat in a potato chip magnet clip on the refrigerator door all summer. Some seasons, I want to see everything on the Lowell Summer Music Series schedule, others, I’m scratching my head wondering who half the acts are, and then there is this season, where I forgot to pay attention.

This year, Robert Cray Band caught my eye, and I knew the name from many moons ago. When the schedule had dwindled to just a few shows remaining due to my piss poor planning, it seemed that would be the show to see. But also due to my piss poor planning, I neglected to talk to my friends about it. Suddenly, it was two days before the show, and it was looking like solo attendance territory, but I was okay with that.

The day of the show was also a Physical Therapy day and an in-office day due to being scheduled out of the office on Friday. Being newly pet responsibility free (may Winston rest in peace) meant I didn’t need to attempt crossing the river during rush hour only to cross back again in an hour. After Physical Therapy, where three Dracut fire trucks flew past the office from two different directions during my appointment, I drove downtown to the regular now-crumbling garage conveniently located across the street from the concert site.

Falafel wrap!

I grabbed the official beach/lawn concert blanket from the back of the car and headed to the park. The flamingo and palm tree imprinted blanket marked my real estate grab sort of at center stage, near the sound booth, and in the early rows of the tall lawn chair section.

It was a few blocks to the office, past a hectic scene at the end of the John and Merrimack Streets where the Lowell Fire Department SUV, and three or four ladder and engine trucks sat with lights flashing and firefighters scurrying to and fro. It seemed to be the morning for fire trucks.

At the end of the workday, I lingered at the office well past 5:00, sipping chilled water, enjoying the quiet, and thinking about what to grab for a picnic supper at the concert, which began at 7:30. There are many options available downtown, but the choice made was the delicious falafel from the “Indian – Pizza – Vegan” shop my friends and I visited before the Lyle Lovett show. 

Robert Cray Band, August 31, 2023.

While camped as a solo concert goer in the crowd on the lawn, someone called my name. Seated in the chair to my left, which had been empty, suddenly sat a friend from the board I’m on. She was also there alone, and it was a just luck we had separately grabbed neighboring spots in our separate land grabs. It was great to have a concert buddy.

The show was good. Jeff LeBlanc opened for the headliner, Robert Cray Band. Robert is super polite, saying “Thank you” and “Thank you very much” after every song. The barefoot bass player chewed gum at a rapid pace the entire set. Overall, the band sounded terrific and the night was fun. The only thing I would have done differently would be to wear a heavier jacket than the denim one I had on. I was cold most of the night, even with the flamingo blanket wrapped around my legs.

random thoughts – Day 1,261 – (Wednesday) – not so grate

The recently ordered floor vent grates for the bathroom and kitchen arrived as expected and smack in the middle of the delivery window provided. The white one for the bathroom looks great – so fresh, so not rusty. Why did I not replace this before? 

Broken. Not so great grate.

The kitchen grate replacement was next. One of the louvers looked wonky in the plastic wrap, but I boldly unwrapped it anyway. The grate was released from the confines of the clear wrap, the lever that operates the louvers was flipped to check the operation, and one louver fell out with a clatter. Ugh. 

The label on the wrapper had instructions stating "Do not return vent to Amazon. Lifetime warranty..." and to email the company with any issues. I wonder if the normal lifetime of the vent grate is longer than the 45 seconds I enjoyed from the kitchen piece.

The email bounced back immediately with a MAILER-DAEMON failure notice. Apparently, my superior typing skills caused me to type dot-con instead of dot-com. The email was eventually sent correctly but there may have been some cuss words involved. If the typing frustration wasn’t enough, I had to pull the old, cruddy vent grate out of the trash, where I had confidently chucked it immediately after removing it from the floor. UGH.

The rest of the night was a bit smoother. There was some shopping for fall pants on kohls online to use the two Kohls Cash coupons that arrived in the mail several weeks ago – one for my birthday, the other for my account anniversary. Plaid pants and Steve Madden loafers will arrive next week. Let’s hope they aren’t defective like the floor grate.

random thoughts – Day 1,260 – (Tuesday) – waiting and wondering

The new bathroom runner was due to deliver today, but this morning, the tracking just said “delivering today,” leaving me to wonder when today that might be. The details showed it originating in Northborough, MA and traveling to Nashua, NH.

Throughout the workday, while hunting down print specs, preparing quote requests, juggling things, and checking things, I was also wondering when the new rug would arrive.

After work, the delivery had been assigned a time of 6:30 to 9:15. The bathroom floor was swept and washed. The previous runner, that I don’t really like, was bought because it was cheap and in a pattern that wouldn’t show doggy grub. It was chosen more to help keep the dogs from wiping out on the tile floor than to be any sort of décor statement.

New bathroom rug.

The concern was that anything nice and new would likely be destroyed with various doggy output, much like the dining room and kitchen rugs with the refreshing lingering undertones of  perma-pee.

Despite my vigilance, I didn’t hear when the rug delivered. It had been on the side deck for a half hour before I conducted another periodic check looking for it. 

But now it’s here, unwrapped from its protective plastic sheath and arranged on the white and light gray tile floor with the grout that used to be pale gray but now sports three different shades of gray. Tomorrow, the fresh, new white duct vent grate should arrive to replace the one that is tan and rusty and cruddy looking in the bathroom and a new tan one will be installed in the kitchen.

With no pups to tend to, there is time to focus on the house while also wondering how long I’ll want to even keep it. Nothing in the house had been changed for the two years of Winston's vision loss and now I just want to change everything. 

One reason for having a house with a yard was so the dogs had space. Suddenly an apartment with a manager to take care of things is feeling mighty appealing. But, really, do I want to move anytime soon? And is moving a practical option to escape mowing the yard? I wonder ....

random thoughts – Day 1,259 – (Monday) – climbing

On the Welch-Dickey Loop Trail,
New Hampshire.

When I first moved back to New England, there was some time invested in hiking. Having grown up in a really hilly city with lots of nearby mountains (not to mention the nearby ocean), the hills were were something I missed while living in Middle Tennessee (the ocean was another thing I missed). In twelve years, there was only one trip made east to the Smoky Mountains, and even then, X2 wasn't into hiking, so we walked about 25 measly feet on a trail so we could say we at least stepped on The Appalachian Trail.

Once back home, there were hikes with Moose to Mt. Wachusett (Winston had a bad knee and couldn't go), and with assorted combinations of friends and sometimes my middle niece (aka Chowdah) to local bumps including Wachusett, Watatic, and Monadnock. They were all great hikes, but one hike was more memorable than the rest for a couple reasons. 

In August 2017, Chowdah and I went hiking one day on the Welch-Dickey Loop Trail (which features two peaks) in the White Mountains in New Hampshire. A colleague had recommended it and it did not disappoint. We set out for the day and the drive took longer than I expected, or maybe it's that I don't like driving and was anxious to just get there. I had on my red hiking boots which had taken me up and down several mountains and through NamSang Park in Seoul several times. I loved those boots.

Flip flop boot #1.

We were barely a half mile into the trail when I kept hearing a slapping sound like flip flops. A trailside investigation led to the discovery that the left sole had detached from the boot upper from the heel to about mid-arch. Some clever redirection of the shoe lace crossed under the arch and the boot was sort of all set. 

Things were working mostly okay with the repair job until the 2.5 mile mark when the sole of the right boot separated at both the heel and the toe, adding a fresh degree of trip hazards and difficulty to the already challenging hike. The right boot also got the MacGyver treatment to keep the sole somewhat attached to the boot upper. 

The other challenge on the hike, besides the boots issue, was crossing a ridge where the wind was blowing just strong enough to make it feel like we would be blown from the face of Mother Earth. Thankfully, this did not happen. 

A few times we paused, and sat, and looked at the view. The hike was only around four miles, but it was steep with a lot of rock, and it took us a smidge less than three hours (2:57) to complete it, my busted boots and all. It was great.

After that hike, there was an investment made in some new boots. Sadly, they haven’t been used much. Schedules, obligations, and my fickle knees and poor planning all conspired to limit the hiking activity. 

Maybe someday there will be more mountain hiking. Or not. Maybe it should start with more flatlands walking than pointy hill climbing. We’ll see.

random thoughts – Day 1,258 – (Sunday) – low-key

Dance rehearsal was on Townsend Common this morning. We had on our big, bright costume skirts and under a cloudy sky we ran through our dances a couple times for an event in mid-September. In the 45 minutes we were on the Common, we were the subjects of countless slowdowns, looks and waves; two horn toots; a thumbs up; two stopped cars with people we knew; and one lady who parked and was disappointed we had already finished. She wanted to take a picture, so we posed, and it took her so long to take it I got a cramp in my thigh as we held our pose. It was fun.

After rehearsal there was a quick stop at the farm stand to look at the plants, and just like the last time, I chose to not buy anything that needed planting and care.  Then, I headed home for a low-key, relaxing afternoon of lunch, stripping the bed, laundry, and a couple rounds of “What’s that smell in the kitchen?” but without a full investigation because I'm a little afraid of what I might find. 

The other recent household game is "What the heck is that weird noise?" which is nerve-rattling, is played randomly throughout all time spent at home, and seems to be more frequent. The BungaLowell has some mysterious noises which are sometimes followed by finding something dead in the yard. There are a lot of scratching noises in the gutters where the birds like to hang out, but lately there are extra thumps, creaks, and creepy sounds inside and outside the house. The other day there was a weird thud at the front door and later, when I went outside to put something in the trash bin, there was a small brown bird laying deceased at the bottom of the front stairs which I buried under the rhododendron.

Soon to arrive.

Today saw more online shopping for the Dryel in-home dry cleaning sheets I forgot to buy the day I looked at it but bought three blouses instead. The blouses arrived several days ago and I don’t love them, so they will likely be sent back. The Dryel will arrive Monday so I can start the sweater freshening for fall. 

A chunk of time was invested in looking at rugs online at Wayfair, Bed Bath and Beyond (now owned by Wayfair), and Amazon. A runner for the bathroom was found, the least urgent of the perceived rug needs, but the only rug found I was reasonably sure I liked. The harder ones to find have been for the kitchen and dining room. It’s entirely possible that the runner purchase will lead to an entire bathroom remodel because that happens. The coffee maker bought months ago led to a series of kitchen changes that doesn't seem to have stopped yet.

random thoughts – Day 1,257 – (Saturday) – breakfast and barbie

Pannukakku breakfast.

The monthly Finnish breakfast was today and Saima Park was jumping. It runs from 8:00 to 10:00, and my family and I usually meet around 8:30. This morning, the place was packed and nearly every table was full. By 9:00, the breakfasts were sold out. 

The attendance varies from month to month and it must be impossible trying to plan how much to make. The feature of the breakfast is pannukakku, an oven baked pancake. It take 40 minutes to bake, so it isn’t like more can just be whipped up in a flash if it’s an extra busy event.

After the breakfast, my sister and I stopped at her house to divide a bag of tomatoes from our friend Jane, then we went out to do errands. We browsed Big Lots and visited every aisle. I usually stock up on the 30-count packages of makeup remover wipes, and check out the grocery items and makeup. I almost never visit every aisle, but we had plenty of time today. My purchases were the real glamourous items – makeup remover wipes (five packs, which should last around four to five months), bar soap, wafer cookies, Wallaby black licorice, Milk Duds and Good and Plenty. After Big Lots, we had time for a stop at Dollar Tree because it wasn’t too far and we still had time.

Barbie movie crew!

Then “the time” finally arrived. We had plans to meet our cousins Missy and Ann Marie, and our friend Jane for the 1:20 screening of Barbie. Yes, I already saw it last Friday, and Missy saw it at a special screening the day before it opened, but we both liked it enough to want to see it again. We also were reminded how hard it is to fit five people in a selfie as we tried to capture the day. 

It was as good the second time as the first. I love the acting and the costumes. All the Barbies and Kens are great. And Allan. BarbieLand features a cul de sac paved in pink brick and lined with Barbie Dream Houses with pastel colored Corvette convertibles in the driveways. So pretty. I could live there.

It was fun to be part of a group at a movie on a Saturday afternoon. I might want to make this a habit. We saw a preview for Wonka, which looks to be the Willy Wonka backstory before Charlie finds the golden ticket and inherits the chocolate factory, which could be kind of fun. 

random thoughts – Day 1,256 – (Friday) -- butt kicked

The week kind of kicked my butt.

Work spent a couple too many days in the nerve-wracking stretch of hurry up and wait limbo where things on my list are at some level of review and approval with other departments (some for over a month) and I’m the phase of waiting. Six or seven entries on my work list are labeled “OFA” (out for approval) and “F/U” for follow up, although saying “eff you” in my head also happens on occasion as I make the notations.

All the OFA and F/U stuff leaves me with not a lot of what feels like productive work and the challenge becomes trying to keep from going nuts during the lull because for as long as I have been working, I get panicky when my active work list is too short. Of course, I also know that when the logjam breaks, I’ll be buried alive all over again and it will be a different flavor of stress but it’s hard to remember I can only control what is within my jurisdiction.

A technology issue caused me to miss a meeting and another meeting had to be by phone instead of video. There was the coordination of a super short-notice rush project and getting the various parts sent out for approvals, tallying up the many projects already OFA, and swatting flies in the form of random questions.

Stress cake. Well, half of it.

One of the day’s random queries was from our warehousing vendor about a low inventory item which led to at least an hour of me tracking down orders for the past several years and running calculations and wondering why the usage was suddenly twice that of recent years while simultaneously trying to prepare a package of files for Compliance review, send another project out for a quote, and do the aggravating follow-ups and a couple other things. For such a super short active work list, it was an extra busy day, but mostly with stupid stuff. 

This was all interspersed with me stress eating two slices of leftover pizza and the last wedge of Wednesday’s birthday cake (in two phases because I'm not a total cave woman) and far too many chocolate candies before the whole vendor thing turned out to be a mistake at their end and I got the “oopsie” message, and a few other details were wrapped up. 

Suddenly, it was after 5:00, I was the last one left on the floor, and I couldn’t get out of there fast enough. Oy.

random thoughts – Day 1,255 – (Thursday) – bookish

It has been a day. A fire over here. A fire over there. A couple of my own cases of “crap, I forgot about that,” and a swirling flurry of questions from all over. I’m blaming Mercury retrograde. It hit yesterday which I didn’t know until I just looked it up, but the way the work day went sure was an indicator. It was along the lines of a Times Square or Vegas chaser lights and neon sign. Definitely not subtle.

Anyway.

An Elaborate Metaphor and good book.

It was Boozy Book Club night, which is my favorite Thursday night of the month. For now anyway. In a couple months it will be changing to Tuesday and I don't know how I will feel about that.

The book was really good – Ashton Hall, a contemporary story with historical fiction element. The lead character got to do research in an old British estate home, reading household ledgers and library borrowing records and reviewing journals and sketch books and all I could think was “How can I get a job like that?” I had a taste of it in Tennessee while working on several projects and I loved every single minute of it. I’m not fussy, and it wouldn’t have to be in an English estate house. It could be in a small American office or library basement somewhere.

My book club beer selection for tonight was Burlington Beer Company’s Elaborate Metaphor, a New England hazy pale ale chosen because I liked the name. It was nice. Our meeting was fun because the conversation was, as always, interesting, and no matter what the book, there are club members who have some real world connection to something in the story and can corroborate details.

Now it’s time to dive into the September book. Oy. I can’t believe it’s almost September already. It doesn’t even feel like the summer started yet and it’s nearly over.

random thoughts – Day 1,254 – (Wednesday) – wow day

Birthday cake and birthday people.

Wednesdays at the office are generally lively with the whole team in the house, but today was extra lively. It was the day of the monthly S&M (sales & marketing) team meeting which was a pizza meeting. It was also the last day of our summer intern being onsite so there were donuts in the morning. The pizza meeting also included birthday cake for the quarterly birthday recognition. And yes, we also did work because there is always work, which intertwined with the eating. 

Then, as if that wasn’t exciting enough, there was an after work get together for drinks and appetizers across the street at Cobblestones. It was planned weeks ago to meet up with a former team member who recently took a new job and is moving to Chicago. Dang, it was pretty sweet. 

Announced as a finalist!

Back at home, it was time to watch America’s Got Talent. I don’t usually watch much network TV, but I’ve been enthralled with Lavender Darcangelo, the amazing singer from Fitchburg. I was anxious to see the results from Tuesday’s semi-final round. I can’t remember the last time I felt at all invested in a talent show, never mind actually logged in and voted for a contestant, but Lavender drew me in. 

Once the result was announced (spoiler, Lavender was one of the two acts that made it through to the finals!), it was back to Netflix and Kleo, a German series described as a “thriller” that is about assassins. It’s in German of course, because Netflix rarely suggests many English language shows for me anymore. The algorithm must think I’m some real fan of European dramas, but really, half the time I’m just too lazy to keep looking for another show. It’s all good. The story is interesting, but one of my favorite things about it is the character Kleo’s wardrobe. There are some great dresses, blouses, and plaid pants, and even the jumpsuit she wore in prison was really cool. New things for which to be on the lookout.  Until the next shiny thing catches my eye anyway.

random thoughts – Day 1,253 – (Tuesday) – shopping pain

Low price for
an Elegant Stain.

The family is traveling to Vegas this fall for my niece’s wedding. This means the anxiety of packing, which is a painful task no matter what the destination or trip duration, but add a special event to the mix and it can get really crazy. 

I found some pants with great potential when wedding guest attire shopping with Mom a couple months ago, but as of now, there is still no top to go with it. The ideal situation would have been finding a top in the store as I walked countless laps around the place looking with the pants in hand, but things rarely work that way for me in the wonderful world of women’s fashion and retail.

I’ve looked in several brick and mortar stores and online at several different vendors and it’s a challenge because the pants are multi-colored. And also covered in tiny sequins. The wrong top could really set it way over the edge. More sequins might just be too much. Plain cotton anything will be too casual for a wedding. The current thinking is something in satin, velvet, or chiffon, in one of the several colors in the pants.

While in Amazon recently to source important survival items like coffee, pet stink remover spray, and shampoo, there were side quests in search of a blouse to go with the pants. Lots of tops have been located online, but some don’t have the size I need or they have not so great reviews about the sizing or the fabric. A search for Dryel in-home dry-cleaning sheets hit pay-dirt with the purchase of three blouses that may or may not work.  

Definitely not a
Solid T Shirt.

The most (only?) fun part of it has been some of the product descriptions. During a search for “satin blouse” an item with the headline “Elegant Stain Puff Sleeve Top” was in the results. I'm always on the lookout for an elegant stain. 

A search for “long sleeve blouse” pulled up a photo of a rather racy, very sheer and lacy blouse described as a “Solid Short Sleeve T Shirt” which is about as far from the photo as it could be. Some of the names  try to load in every potential keyword which  definitely keeps it interesting. And confusing.

Neither the “Elegant Stain” blouse nor the not so “Solid Short Sleeve T Shirt” were bought. But by the end of the week, there should be a delivery with one “Women's Velvet Wrap Crop Top Long Sleeve V Neck Puff Dressy Blouse Vintage 2023 Fall Winter Casual Top T-Shirt Pumpkin”, one “Women Casual Satin Blouse Shirts Tie V Neck Long Lantern Sleeve Loose Lightweight Fashion 2023 Summer Spring Tops(Solid Rose Red)” and one “Women Casual Satin Blouse Shirts Tie V Neck Long Lantern Sleeve Loose Lightweight Fashion 2023 Summer Spring Tops(Solid Army Green)”. I hope the box is big enough to hold those product names. Oy. I also hope at least one of them works with the pants (fingers are crossed).

random thoughts – Day 1,252 – (Monday) – fall forward

Back when I was young (uttered in a total old person’s voice), this was the time of year I was fixated on thoughts of back to school. I would have been practicing my penmanship and signature for two weeks by now. My outfit for the first day was often already determined, having been my birthday gift from Mummu and usually chosen by me when we shopped together.

In seventh grade, the first day of school outfit was a short brown dress with long sleeves and a waist that was several inches of smocked elastic. The fabric had small houses printed all over it in white line art and I wore it with white vinyl knee high go-go boots. It was the first day at junior high and I was afraid the friend I was supposed to walk to school with would make us late so I walked alone to avoid the risk. 

For ninth grade the outfit included a light peach turtleneck worn with hunter green pants and a hunter green sweater jacket with a multicolored geometric design (that included peach) on the front panels. It had a shawl collar and a matching knit tie belt in hunter green. Another year of high school it was brown and yellow plaid high waisted pants with a yellow ribbed turtleneck. Oddly enough, I have recently become obsessed with finding the perfect plaid trousers, for which I may have to dust off the sewing machine and make for myself.

Being a schoolkid was fun with the excitement of the beginning and end of the school year and the various breaks in between – Christmas break, February vacation, April vacation, and summer vacation. I miss the promise of a new school year and wondering who might be in my various classes, study halls, and lunch periods, and if any boys would like me enough to ask me out on a date and then actually show up on the arranged day and time.

New to me handknit sweater.

Even though the calendar year begins in January, I still think of time in terms of school years and September as the start of things. I don’t love cold weather, but I’ve always loved sweaters and fall boots. 

Maintaining some of the old-time student fun vibe, this past weekend, I bought myself a chunky sweater, perfect for the crisp fall days that are on the way. Sure, it was from a thrift shop, but it’s a knit similar to what Mummu used to do, and it’s a bit oversized and a little long, like my favorite fisherman’s sweater she made for Ex1 that I very regrettably didn’t swipe from him during the divorce even though I wore it more than he did. When I learned he moved to Florida, I really regretted not grabbing the sweater. 

I might not have the minty fresh start of a new school year to look forward to, but there is still the promise of the crisp fall air, and walks amongst the colorful leaves or along a New England beach on a fall day where the air, water, and sand are all in tones of gray. And a new-to-me bargain of a hand knit wool sweater, waiting for some fall adventures. Not that I want summer to go, because I definitely do not, but it can't hurt to be prepared.

random thoughts – Day 1,251 – (Sunday) – family day

It was another sunny Sunday, much welcomed after the mostly wet summer. It was also the day of the annual family cookout at my paternal Aunt’s house, which I look forward to each summer. Multiple canopies had been strategically set in the yard, providing ample shade and comfortable places to sit and chat. 

For several years when I was young, Dad’s family had a big cookout each year around Independence Day, but somewhere along the line, either the cookouts stopped happening, or we stopped attending. I was a tween or maybe an early teen, so I don’t know what happened. I went to my maternal grandmother’s or wherever my parents said we were going until the summer I turned 15 when I got a job, which was used as an excuse to avoid doing many things. (This habit has continued well onto adulthood.)

Primrose.

In any event, in the years since returning from Tennessee, it’s been fun attending the family cookout and spending time with relatives I wish I knew better when we were all  younger. We all lived in different towns and attended different schools, so it wasn’t like my many cousins and I could run into each other or meet up to hang around together after school. Logistics were involved, like parents and schedules and transportation.

Once again, this year's family potluck resulted in a magnificent abundance of food. There were grilled things, salad things, pickled things, salty, savory, and sweet things. I ate until it hurt and still hadn’t sampled everything. I failed to take any decent photos, but a couple cousins were on the case. 

After an afternoon that flew by, it was suddenly time to return to The BungaLowell where the house is overly quiet, the primrose is flowering, and the yard still smells of freshly cut grass from Saturday’s mow.  

random thoughts – Day 1,250 – (Saturday) – weird encounter

Early on Saturday afternoon, the breezes picked up, the leaves were flashing their undersides, the clouds were gathered overhead, and it felt like it would rain again. It wasn’t raining yet, though, so I hustled outside to get the yard mowed. I had dressed in a “probably not leaving the house” ensemble of camo patterned cargo capris, a heather gray tee shirt, and the lavender colored, paint and grass stained Converse sneakers that have clearly seen fresher days. There was no need to change clothes for worry of sweating in anything “nice.”

The shaggy yard.

The mower was removed from the shed, along with the very long electrical cord required to propel it. The cord is a bit of a pain, but overall, the electric mower is far superior to the old gas mower. It’s easier to start and it doesn’t conk out partway through the job, so minding the cord is a minor inconvenience. 

It hadn’t rained since yesterday, but the shaggy, overgrown lawn was still wet closer to the ground and it clumped up under the mower. The growth required a couple passes in some spots and took more effort than usual, but I also hadn’t done it in three weeks. With sciatica flaring in the left leg, I got the front yard done.

As I gathered up the 50-foot cord before rolling the mower out the gate and around to the back of the house, the neighbor guy was standing on his porch. He waved, and I said "Hey," and he asked if the mower was electric. I said, yes, and he started asking another question. I heard “Do you” and thought he was going to ask if I liked the mower (I do), but he continued with “want to make five bucks?”

I’m sure I looked confused, because that is what I felt and I am not always good at stopping thoughts from broadcasting themselves on my face. He tilted his head towards his own sizeable back yard behind the tall privacy fence where his wife had been toiling for at least an hour, tending to the pool and the flower garden.

I kind of laughed, and said, “Nah, I don’t think so,” which was much more polite than the “Are you frigging kidding?” that was rolling around in my head. Then he said, completely serious, “How about seven?” Again, I said, “I don’t think so” and shook my head as I proceeded down the driveway, across the front of the yard, up the driveway on the other side, and to the back yard.

While untangling the power cord, plugging in the mower, and completing the second phase of yard work, I had time (about a half hour) to think about the ridiculous question. Five bucks to mow your lawn? Seriously? That’s how much my brother made mowing lawns in 1976. I don't know what the going rate is for lawn mowing nowadays, but five dollars is not really worth my time for hard physical labor. 

Even better, the guy offering the generous sum has four fully functional adults living in his home. There is his wife, who is constantly working in the yard. There is an adult daughter with a young son, and an adult son who rarely steps outside and might actually be a vampire. And there is the neighbor guy himself, who is usually only seen in the driveway briefly as he leaves or returns on his little scooter. I’m not sure he has even been in his own back yard.

So no, neighbor man who is probably ten years younger than I am and who has far more potential help in the household, I will not mow your yard, which is larger than mine and will take me between 30 and 45 minutes to do, for five dollars. Although … I could buy 15 bricks of ramen at Market Basket with a wad like that.

While mowing with the left leg sciatica and the right knee pain that activated once in the back yard,  and mulling the brief conversation, I wished I had delivered a snappy comeback, but those have become tragically scarce. Social interaction used to keep me sharp, but the absence of local friends and social activities, and the solitude of living alone mean that most days I possess, at best, barely functional, primitive conversational skills. The witty repartee once specialized in was lost over a decade ago, around the time I crossed back over the Mason Dixon line to return home. 

Once upon a time, I might have asked him what year he thought it was and if he was feeling feverish. He might have been commended for his comedic skills. There might have been a rapid fire round of snarky questions and hilarious comments. Instead, he got a confused “I don’t think so” and I got to think “What in the actual f*ck?” Very unsatisfying. I’ve got some work to do.

random thoughts – Day 1,249 – (Friday) – movie date

Friday featured another weather mixed bag where it began to rain, luckily after I was settled at my desk. Later in the morning it rained more heavily. Then the sun came out, then it rained, and back and forth it went all day. At least twice the sun was shining while it was raining. By 5:00, it seemed to have settled on not raining any more.

Since seeing the social media ads before Barbie opened on July 21, I’ve wanted to see the movie. There were several reasons for the delay of nearly a month. When it first opened, I assumed it would be too crowded and decided to wait a week or so. Then real life got in the way and a week became nearly a month.

Yes, I enjoyed the movie.

Show times and ticket availability were checked many times and none bought. There are three movie theaters in a reasonable distance from The BungaLowell. Seeing the movie early in the week was ruled out because, well, “work night” has the same feeling to me as being a kid and it being a “school night.”

Thursday after work, ticket availability was checked for Thursday and Friday but a case of laziness kicked in and none were bought. Friday after work, the movie times were checked again, with screenings at 7:05, 7:30, and 7:45 available. 

There were very few tickets left at Showcase Cinema de Lux in Lowell (two!) and AMC in Tyngsboro (six!), but Chunky’s in Pelham had quite a lot of tickets and the later screening time, so it was fewer people and no need to rush out the door for the win. The bonus was Chunky’s tickets cost less than the other two theaters ($8.50 vs $14) and has beer, wine, cocktails, and a full menu. It was a no-brainer, really. Some day maybe I'll feel secure enough about money that I won't have to be my own cheapskate date.

Chunky's beer and fries.

After all the deliberation, I finally committed. The beverage of choice was Winni Amber Ale, a New Hampshire brew. The snack of choice after a day of already eating way too much stuff was sweet potato fries. Both were wise choices.

As for the movie – I liked it. A lot. The acting was great. I loved all the Barbies. I loved all the Kens. And Alan. Oh man, Michael Cera as Alan was perfect. The costumes were great. Barbie Land was magical and it must be great to have a perfect day every day. Ken’s Mojo Dojo Casa House cracked me up. I want the Barbie pink Corvette convertible. And the story was really good. Depression Barbie and Weird Barbie offered some relatable moments.

At the end of the movie, I took myself back to the real world in my very not Barbie not pink Jeep to the very not Barbie Dream House where cars were double parked at the end of the street with the slimmest of openings to get into my driveway. So very not Barbie Land. Sigh.

random thoughts – Day 1,248 – (Thursday) – lesson drawer

Drawer drinks.

There are two produce drawers in the refrigerator. One is where the veggies live when I bother to buy them. The other contains canned beers and Finnish Long Drink, and a bottle of white wine. Delicious chilled liquids.

Today I realized the produce drawer hadn’t been opened in weeks because I haven’t been cooking, eating salad, or even grocery shopping, due to a general lack of interest in any of it. Curious, I opened the produce drawer. It was ugly. 

Three-quarters of a two-week old cucumber wore a fuzzy white sweater. It lounged limply atop a bunch of mostly liquified and nearly unrecognizable Romaine lettuce that was soaking in a puddle of brown juice that had seeped into a nearly full two-pound bag of carrots. Ewwww.

It was a clear case of “out of sight, out of mind.” Unfortunately, now I can’t scrub the memory of it from my mind.

The drawer was removed from the fridge, the mess removed from the drawer, and the liquified goo poured down the sink. The garbage disposal couldn’t be trusted to handle the massive mess of carrots so they were double bagged with the rancid cucumber and set outside in the trash bin where they will continue to decompose until the next trash pickup.

The drawer was soaked with hot soapy water, scoured, and sanitized. The temporarily empty space where the drawer sat was wiped with sanitizing wipes. From the drawer area, eyes wandered upward. On the left side of the top shelf where eyes rarely visit, sat congealed soup from at least two weeks ago. Atop that was a container of the weird rice, cheese, broccoli that was excavated from the freezer around the same time as the soup. More ewwww.

The extended time spent in the refrigerator highlighted how all the shelves would benefit from a tidy up so now that is on the list of delightful domestic crap to be dealt with. Oh, goody. Can’t wait.

Luckily, the second drawer has no danger of cultivating way-past-prime rotted food because it 

The lesson I’m tempted to take from this misadventure is not the healthier one to pay more attention to the perishables and eat them in a timely manner. It’s to fill both drawers with beer and wine, which won’t have time to betray me and spoil. And to stick with the freezer where the ice cream, pizza, and freeze pops live.

random thoughts – Day 1,247 – (Wednesday) – screwy

Ugh. Dark already at 8:15. I miss the good old days (a month ago? two?) when it was light until nearly 9:00.

Screwy.

Speaking of the old days … on this date in 2012, it was a Thursday (I looked it up), and the screws were removed from the leg that was broken in the spectacular roller derby incident of October 22, 2011. 

The rod hadn’t been a problem and is still in my shin, but the screws were freaking me out. The two screws at the knee seemed like they were trying to burst forth on their own, and I was sure I could see the heads of the two in the ankle through my pale skin. So yeah, out they came. 

Fasting was required the night before, which of course meant that even though I didn’t usually eat anything late at night, that particular night, I was suddenly wanting late night snacks. The next day it was off to the surgeon.

Here are the odd parts – I don’t remember who drove me to the doctor or how I got back home, nor do I recall if the procedure was at the surgeon's office near the hospital or at the hospital. According to the Facebook post made later that day, the nap during the procedure was nice. 

Recovering with my beloved boys.

After the ordeal, I was swaddled in gauze and ace bandages, then I was back home, parked on the couch with my leg propped up on pillows and my beloved Canine Overlords at my side. I remember later being glad to have taken the next day off from work because I almost didn't, and the whole thing was a bigger production than anticipated and it wiped me out. 

A plastic container holding the four shockingly long screws came with me after the removal. The container and contents now live in some forgotten place in the house, having made the journey with me from Tennessee. For what purpose, I don’t know. Just part of the collection of random and sometimes gross oddities.

random thoughts – Day 1,246 – (Tuesday) – calm then yelling

Tiny rose.

The neighborhood has been mostly quiet lately. Calm. Peaceful. Almost, dare I say it, boring. Even the Nuisance House hasn’t been very much of a nuisance, which has been kind of great.

Today, though, things got a tiny bit spicy. As I toiled at the yolk yellow desk, eyes burning from the new movie screen sized monitor, with a super tiny rose plant from my sister on the windowsill, very phlegmy coughing could be heard from a yard behind mine. It was the second day of such coughing, and it went on long enough that I worried the person doing the coughing might expel a lung and kick the bucket.

Not long after the coughing, a voice could be heard from the same back yard area. It grew louder, intruding into my auditory space, which made it feel like a good time for a quick break.

Seeking clarity, or at least a spot where I could hear the outburst more clearly, I moved to an open window. From the bathroom, snatches of what sounded like an impassioned argument floated across the yard. “How can that be racist? I’ve listened over and over and there is NOTHING racist!” There was more yelling and then something about “small town” and I concluded this was one side of an argument about the Jason Aldean song, “Try that in a small town.” There was some more yelling, then suddenly, the loud talk went silent.

The Sherlock Holmes hat came off and I returned to my work of sending out photo files. It wasn’t long before the quiet was shattered again with excited cries of “Discovery! Discovery!” Then there were some unclear words and more loudness with “April blah 2023 blah RNC.” And then silence. I imagined back yard guy had been punching questions into Google to support whatever he was arguing.

Just then, neighborhood white cat with gray patches sprinted diagonally across the back yard from the shed towards the deck. And then it got quiet again, and stayed quiet for the rest of the afternoon. No more fragments of arguments, and it wasn’t as exciting as some of the other local events, but it was a nice little break in the silence.

random thoughts – Day 1,245 – (Monday) – plus one

This year’s birthday was eased into. If not for Mom and my sister tag teaming me to commit to a plan a week in advance, it might have been ignored by me completely, like I was able to do a couple times during the pandemic. This year's easy, low-key lunch date was perfect. 

It's not that I'm against birthdays, and I certainly like birthday cake and other people's parties. I'm just not a  fan of there being a big fuss made on my birthday. 

Birthday coupon delivery.

Today, at birthday plus one day, there was an easy, low-key extension of the easy, low-key day-of celebration.

Today, the free birthday dessert coupon from my favorite delivery place was used. A large, extra cheese pizza was ordered for delivery, plus one free Ben and Jerry’s Salted Caramel ice cream. The pizza was cut into unequal sized slices, and somehow there were nine of them. After eating a regular sized sliced and a skinny one, there were still seven slices left. It felt like a bonus, but I’m easily amused sometimes.

The birthday cupcake from my sister was enjoyed. Yes, I lit the candle. And took a photo. Then I ate half in the afternoon and the other half at supper. It was chocolate with peanut butter filling and fluffy peanut butter frosting and a tiny peanut butter cup on top and it was delicious. Good choice, sis. Too bad I forgot to make a birthday wish.

Birthday cupcake.

The ice cream will be breached later this week, and with proper rationing, it will last several nights. The same plan will be used for the candies. Theoretically. That crazy idea usually doesn’t work with candy, so we’ll have to stay tuned on that one.

Physical torture took place after work today instead of before. I was glad to have it today, because I couldn’t get comfortable to sleep last night, and it was a lot of tossing and turning, interspersed with swearing. And the bad news from the torturer is that it was likely aggravated by dance rehearsal yesterday. There were other words too, but I had glazed over by then. She pressed and poked a really sore spot for a while before I was launched into the usual series of exercises with some new ones added into the mix. It hurt all over again. Hooray.

random thoughts – Day 1,244 – (Sunday) – birthday day

Not a thunderstorm!

The forecast for Sunday, as seen a few days earlier, included the word “thunderstorm,” which had our dance group on high weather alert about our planned outdoor rehearsal. Luckily, the morning was sunny, warm, a bit humid, and rain-free when we gathered on the common in the center of Townsend. We ran through our dances under a mostly blue sky and the curious glances of a few people in and around the park. 

After the dancing, where I kept stepping on my own skirt during the first dance because I forgot to roll the waistband, there was a quick visit to the farm stand up the road to check out the plants. No plants caught my interest enough to want to do the work of planting and caring for them, and it was off to the next chapter of the day.

Mom, StepDad, my sister, and I met at Bailey’s Bar and Grille in Townsend for lunch. There is a beautiful patio there with plentiful shade and plantings, and depending upon the direction you are facing, you have no idea there is a major roadway out front and a shopping plaza in the back. We sat inside in non-humid, air-conditioned comfort and admired the patio from our table by the window.

Gifties!

The birthday included some fun gifts including Scandinavian and Finnish treats from a friend and a Happiness candle from my sister. I knew all about the happiness producing qualities of candy, but happiness in a candle was news to me. Sis also gave me a big cupcake so it wouldn’t be a cake-free day. There was also a small sculpture of a dragonfly (number 813 of a series of 1,000) bought for myself from Bear Bones Sculpture in Fitchburg when I was out there on Friday.  

A low-key birthday was the perfect birthday acknowledgement for this year. It was so low-key it included a two-hour nap. All good. And now the next adventurous trip around the sun is underway.

random thoughts – Day 1,243 – (Saturday) – pieces

Remnants.

The house, which is usually quiet, is extra quiet with no pets. There is no occasional clinking of the metal ID tag on the water bowl, no little yips and sighs from a dreaming fur baby, no scratches at the door to go out or to come inside. The water bowl and remainder of Winston's Friday breakfast were emptied this morning and set in the dishwasher.

There are other things still to deal with like the remaining half of the 17-plus pound bag of pricey prescription food. Plus bowls, beds, sweaters, disposable toddler diapers, and doggy wraps. Not to mention the kitchen drawer stuffed with pet brushes, leashes, harnesses, poop bags, and multiple clippers. Just not today. Do I keep some of it in case there is a future similarly sized canine companion?

Or have I already lived enough of my life saving space for imagined future events and living beings (human and otherwise)? For three years I held on to a pair of men’s dress shoes, bought on a whim at a bargain price for a photo prop, with the underlying hope of magically manifesting the man who had the style and confidence to fill them (true story). It didn't work.

There is a closet full of clothes for “in case” I’m ever invited to a fancy [fill in name of event that never transpired] by a [still unmet person/soul mate/paramour]. The line of thinking that includes “in case I need it someday” is part of the reason that there is one room in the house that is crammed with stuff and unusable.

The slow and extra quiet morning was spent with coffee, Italian cookies for breakfast, a phone call with Mom, and rattling around the newly too empty house. There is suddenly no reason to stand in the middle of the yard or at the front doorway, and this morning I realized how frequently that activity took place. By the time I finally got dressed it was nearly time to leave for the reception. The closet wheel of fortune spun and landed on a summer dress I forgot I owned and haven’t worn in a couple years. It was clean and it fit, the most important criteria in any day's attire decision, so there was a winner.

Quilts from "Flower Power."

The day’s schedule included a reception for the “Flower Power” quilt exhibit at The Brush, and it was a lucky coincidence that my dress was covered in brightly colored flowers that fit the theme of the show. 

The quilts are amazing, and I have great admiration for people who can conceive and execute such works. The stitching was so precise. One piece included accents of perfectly placed tiny shimmery seed beads. Art quilts go far beyond grandma’s repeating block pattern scrap quilt. Some look like paintings from a distance, and others convey sculptural qualities. So cool.

random thoughts – Day 1,242 – (Friday) – life changes

Winston came to live with Moose and me in January 2012. Moose had been moping around, and I  thought he was lonely. I imagined that having another dog around would provide him with a best buddy and they would run and play together and cuddle on the couch in a puppy puddle.

Winston.

Reality was a bit different. Instead of becoming best buddy doggy brothers, they seemed more like frenemies who tolerated each other. Any cuddling happened when they were fighting for my lap, and if they accidentally touched each other there were clear displays of dissatisfaction. After Moose crossed the Rainbow Bridge in August 2021, there was no longer any canine interest in cuddling with me. Life is cruel.  

Over the past two years, Win and I continued our life together. Much of the minutia of daily life continued as before – bedtime, getting up time, dinner time, all mostly the same. Some things were noticeably different. I felt sadder. Winston was much quieter, no longer barking at noise from the street, knocks on the door, or much of anything. There was a Moose-shaped hole in life and a bit more room on the bed, and we powered on. 

Win and I adapted to the cataracts and blindness that developed after his diabetes diagnosis. I stayed alert for more problems with his back legs. Chopped grocery store roasted chicken, added to meals in Moose’s final months, continued and the grocery shopping schedule continued to be dictated by the need for weekly chicken. Win was my good morning and my good night.

Most recently, Win had been slowing down. The stairs were more difficult, and he had trouble getting out of his bed. For three or four weeks, he’s been walking in circles – able to walk a straight line for only three or four steps before beginning to circle clockwise, around and around.

For a week since calling the vet, I’ve been keeping a sharper eye on Winston and preparing myself for the worst. This morning, the worst happened and it was Winston’s turn to cross the Rainbow Bridge. And just like that, the Moose shaped hole is now paired with the Winston shaped hole. In my imagination, Moose met him there, they did their usual low-level growl at each other, and trotted off to new adventures. 

As for me, my next adventure will be muddling through. It’s been nearly 14 years of having constant canine companionship, first with one dog, then two, then one again. And now there are none, and it might take time to adjust to the change. Who will I talk to? Several times, as the afternoon grew late, I checked the clock to see if it was time to start Winston's dinner, one of the drivers of daily life for ages.

random thoughts – Day 1,241 – (Thursday) – city wildlife

The wildlife critters of the cozy (code for small) grounds of The BungaLowell regularly feature Brown Bunny, Chuck Wood, the white kitty, the black kitty, the ginger kitty, the skunk that sprays fragrance into the air in the late night hours, and who knows what other unseen creatures. There are many more wildlife creatures in the vicinity, based on the deceased remnants on the roadside, which always makes me sad. The fawns and grown deer, turkeys and other birds, and the cats and dogs.

Some of the wildlife even makes its way downtown for a real city experience.

Garage oposum.

On August 10, 2017, as I pulled into a great corner parking spot on the fourth floor of the garage, an opossum (possum?) sat on the ledge of the window. To me, it looked nervous, but that might be the human tendency to assign human feelings to critters. 

Upon seeing said opossum, the mental debate began – to park, or not to park? Will I startle the furry little friend and cause him to topple out the window? Will it launch itself at me? I did what I had to do – parked the car and took pictures of my new friend.

On the way out of the garage, I found someone who worked there to tell him about the potentially nervous opossum in the window. Someone had already reported a “giant rat” on the third level, but the worker hadn’t found it when checking. I showed the picture of the opossum and clarified both the species and location, and he said he would contact Animal Control.

I still think it
wanted to jump.

Out on the sidewalk, I looked up to the window. The opossum seemed to be peering from under the window bar on level four as if it wanted to jump. I certainly understood (understand) the feeling.

There was enough concern about my new little furry friend that I sought out the garage staffer after work. The update on the critter from the garage guy was that when Animal Control arrived, the little marsupial was asleep on the ledge. Animal Control picked it up and relocated it to nature somewhere. I hope the opossum was placed someplace that didn’t frighten it. Someplace comfortable, and hopefully familiar.

In my imagination, the parking garage opossum frolics amongst the trees. No more confusing multi-level concrete garage for this little dude (dudette?). It hangs by its tail, happily ever after, in a wooded wonderland. Perhaps the nearby Lowell-Dracut-Tyngsboro State forest.

I haven't seen any other furry friends in the garage since the day of the opossum. Maybe that's a good sign that they are all in the woods playing, for as long as there are woods to play in.

random thoughts – Day 1,240 – (Wednesday) –cake and walk

Little cakes and cupcakes!

It was an office office day and all was well. There was snack and share, and I had signed up for today. The snack was my interpretation of childhood birthday parties as I remember them – cake and potato chips. I had considered baking a cake in honor of my own birthday, but in the end, that just felt like work. Instead of baking, I brought in Little Debby individually wrapped cakes and mini cupcakes from Market Basket bakery.  

There was an afternoon walk downtown and the Map My Walk app was working today so there are statistics logged. The last walk logged in the app was 336 days ago. Yikes. On that long ago day, I walked .97 miles in 18 minutes 28 seconds. The note in the record says “Left leg hurt after ¼ mile.” 

Cool downtown
building.

Today’s walk was 1.15 miles in 23 minutes and 51 seconds. Today’s note is “Shins hurt, both legs at .75 miles.” It felt like sudden onset of shin splints. Today’s walk included at least nine stops for photos, providing further (unnecessary) proof that I can’t usually do just one thing at a time. But when I see something interesting, I usually stop and take a photo. And there is almost always something interesting to see.

After work I attended a party I had been invited to. It was nice to be in a room of smart and interesting people and even nicer that I knew several of them and had a chance for actual conversation.

After 90 minutes, I had to cut out to get home to take care of Winston. I felt awful to make him wait so long for me, but he did remarkably well with my delay. Thank goodness for doggy wraps and the marvelous technology of toddler diapers.

random thoughts – Day 1,239 – (Tuesday) – not thursday

Evening primrose finally flowering.

Working in the office on Monday, which is usually a remote day, had me confused on Tuesday. It kept feeling like a Thursday, which is really going to stink when Wednesday doesn't turn out to be Friday. 

The evening primrose that runs along the deck and that I recall blooming in July in past years, is just beginning to flower now, which is confusing me on the month. It really doesn’t take much to derail me lately.

There was Physical Torture at 7:30 this morning. I got there early and shortly after I arrived, it began to rain really hard, so that worked out pretty well. I was glad to be inside, even if it was for the torture session. Surprisingly, it didn’t hurt nearly as much as the previous appointments.

When the torturer asked how it felt today and I said, “It hurt the least of any days so far,” she got a big, bright smile. Then she said, “That means I can give you more next time!” The tone was all chirpy and cheerful, but it gave me an ominous chill.

The morning downpour was short-lived and by the time I was done PT, it had stopped raining. It resumed a couple times later in the day. Winston slept on the office rug all day, except when he was sleeping in the living room. He seems much better today. 

After work, the gym parking lot was crowded, but the place is huge, so it didn’t feel that crowded inside.  All five recumbent bikes were available, yet, I ended up on the weird one that doesn’t log the heart rate. I thought I set it to Level 3 on the hill program, but it took an unusually long time to log any miles. Usually, after 30 minutes plus the cooldown, the distance shows at more than six miles. Tonight, it was around three miles, after steadily pedaling like crazy the whole time. The person who sat on the bike next to me after I was ten minutes in, pedaled at half the speed I was doing and their distance was logging twice what mine was. Not that I was taking notes or anything.

Brown Bunny under
 the leaves in the rain.

There was a trip to Market Basket after the gym, and as I left for home, the clouds had gathered, dark and heavy. A couple of the smaller ones looked like charcoal briquets suspended over the store. When I got home, the sky was brighter and bluer beyond The BungaLowell, but it wasn’t long before it got dark and the rain fell again. 

Brown Bunny was out front, sheltering under the arch formed by the leaves of two clumps of irises. He stayed there for quite a while after the rain stopped, until it was too dark for me to see him any longer.