random thoughts – Day 2,245 (Sunday) – low-key

To plan for Mother’s Day, Sis and I did what we usually do. We asked Mom what she wanted to do, knowing there was a high likelihood she would say what she usually says, which is that she doesn't really want to do anything. It is my understanding from a very unscientific survey of a small group of mothers with which I am acquainted that it is the sentiment of many mothers that they would just like to stay home in a quiet house and not be bothered. Despite the maternal guidance, Sis and I did what we usually do and made a plan anyway. I guess it’s not that different from when Mom was a younger mother and we were younger kids and we didn’t listen to her then, either. 

We invaded Mom's house for a low-key day. We drank coffee and ate and talked for several hours. My sister had stories of the latest workplace drama which are always funny when she tells them. My niece was in a wedding yesterday and had stories and photos to share. As a mostly antisocial, unemployed, self-directed sweat shop operator/worker with no colleagues, I didn’t really have any good stories to share.

Kiki at the window,
May 10, 2026.

Mom’s windows have a view of her strategically placed backyard bird feeders. Most any spot in her living room has a great view of the antics of the squirrels, chipmunks, birds and a menagerie of wildlife. As we commented on the action of the squirrels outside the window, I suggested we create a news desk and narrate the action like sports announcers or Olympics judges with score cards. “Squirrel number one executed a bold and magnificent leap from the tree towards the allegedly squirrel-proof hanging bird feeder and really stuck the landing. I give it a nine.”

Later, my delightful feline fur baby posed in the window long enough for me to take her picture. It had thundered and rained earlier and the grass was lush and green and the pavement was still wet in places, and she surveyed the yard beyond. She’d probably have more fun looking out back to the woods with all the critters which included a groundhog this morning, but she doesn’t seem to know that area exists.

random thoughts – Day 2,244 (Saturday) – food and work

The gray, rainy morning made it hard to get out of bed. It also washed away any desire to fulfill any of the potential activities for the day. Plant swap the next town over? No, thanks, it’s raining. Steampunk Festival in Waltham? Nope. Requires a drive, and it’s raining. International Gem and Jewelry in Marlborough? No. See above. And so on. There were flashbacks to the year when it rained nearly every weekend in the summer.

Fortifying breakfast.

There may have been no motivation for fun out of the house activities, but in the house there were bright spots. Breakfast was a winner. A fried egg with cheese on an English muffin with a schmear of butter and some apricot preserves really hit the spot, set a cozy tone for the day, and powered me through until suppertime.

Once fortified, the finishing work on the dance top was started. Music played from the laptop (Dark Cello again). The top was tried on for final fit adjustments and a couple seams were adjusted. Narrow elastic was added to the back bottom edge, learned from the stretchy top done a month or so ago. Topstitching was done on all edges to keep the lining from showing, learned from having made the same pattern many moons ago for my first belly dance show in Tennessee. Three sets of small hooks and eyes were added to the inside front edges, and the two decorative filigree clasps on the outer front. And it’s done. It took two shifts – the morning shift got a lot done, but when mistakes and frustration began creeping in it was time to set it aside and do something else.

 

Done!

A break was taken with a trip to the wet world outside. The quest was fruit for a salad for Sunday, and the initial plan was to go to Aldi, and if I didn’t find everything I wanted there, I would go to WalMart. I took a premature turn and ended up at WalMart first. It was crowded, but I found a parking spot and went in, dodging the raindrops.

I breezed through the produce and then checked the craft aisle for a scissor sharpener I saw Friday at another store, didn’t buy, and regretted during the morning sewing session when my scissors were not behaving. No scissor sharpener. I returned to the produce department and got pineapple, mango, and cantaloupe.  I interacted with people in the checkout line, so it wasn’t a totally antisocial day. When I headed back to the car it was raining more assertively than when I went in and the decision to not take an umbrella or even a hat was regretted. A dude in a tiny red car nearly ran me over as he backed out of a parking spot. That was fun. My hands were full so I couldn't even flip off the driver.

At Aldi, I got green grapes and some veggies that I knew would cost less than the prices I saw at WalMart, and then splurged on a gigantic refrigerated five cheese pizza. It was so big, it hung off the edges of my pizza pan. It was a good $5 expenditure and a great supper. For a rainy, crappy day it had some bright spots with good food and the completion of a task. Now it’s time to assess the remaining costume needs and wrap it up. There are other non-dance related projects in the queue that need attention.

random thoughts – Day 2,243 (Friday) – zoned out

On Thursday, I was in the zone, cranking out a sewing project. Today, I was more zoned out. 

A country drive was taken to a national chain store still carrying fabric by the yard and sewing materials. The list was short: a decorative fastener for the top made yesterday; some sort of trim for the top made yesterday; drawstring cord for the big skirt made a week or two ago; two types of hook and eye closings for a couple costume parts and to have on hand; and elastic to restock what has been used in recent projects. Some of these had already been looked for in WalMart without luck, so the net had to be cast wider.

Supplies.

At the destination retailer, I was greeted with signs declaring that all fabric was 30% off until Saturday and was tempted to look at it all, but stuck to the list and the original mission. The basic types of hooks and eyes were found (check!). The options for decorative closings were limited to buckles, satin frog closings (wrong vibe) and a metal filigree design in silver tone and gold tone. I got the gold tone filigree (check!). I scrutinized the trim rack. There were rhinestones, fringe, fringe with rhinestones, tassels, lace, pom poms, and nothing even close to suitable for the top. The ribbon display had reels of the wrong solid colors and prints that were all wrong, like mushrooms, butterflies, and polka dots (fail!). There was no cording in the fabric department, but the clerk there asked a colleague and I was led to the “wearable crafts” aisle and shown the 550 parachute cording that is used for bracelets and other woven items (check!). The skirt is big enough to be a parachute, so it seems appropriate.

The quick procurement of the list items didn’t stop me from slipping into a zoned out state and walking a chunk of the store. The wearable craft aisle is at the furthest location from the exit, so I had to navigate some square footage anyway. I discovered they sell sheets of glass for stained glass making and drooled over the wooden display cabinet with vertical slots holding the glass sheets. My glass sheets live in a milk crate and in a pile on top of the milk crate, still wrapped in packing paper from the move. The one from Tennessee. In 2013. I wish I was exaggerating. 

In nearly every aisle and department there were decorative letters in various sizes and fonts from two-foot tall paper mâché freestanding sculptures to two-inch flat wood cutouts. As I read through the alphabet in one area, I noticed there was no “I”. Then I noticed there was also no “U”. I even looked behind the neighboring letters. That had me checking each time I saw a display and in several areas that was the case. So weird. Why? If you are doing initials and yours happen to be an I or a U, or gawd forbid, both U and I, I guess you are out of luck, sucker!

While I was entertaining myself inventorying the alphabet in crafts and home décor, a manager type dude was talking with a group and going over the philosophy of the floor layout. “Imagine each display as an investment. You want to maximize your ROI.” He talked about displaying products that were movers, and what to do with others that weren’t moving. I tried to get away from the cluster and left the garden décor area, but they caught up with me again in the craft aisles. 

In my accidental and spontaneous craft store retail management class I learned the plan is to get all the rest of the fall stuff out ASAP. This store usually has Christmas on full display by June 25, so that tracks. It was interesting but there was a lot of info being relayed and I forgot most of it because I was shopping and not taking notes. I made my way through displays of pilgrims, pumpkins, autumn leaves, and straw bales, past the displays of drawer pulls and knobs, signs proclaiming “Dad's Garage” and “She Shed” and finally to the register and freedom.

View from the bedroom.

Back at home, the azalea is now fully exploded with color and visible through the bedroom window. The fiddleheads are tall and releasing their lacy fern fronds.

Inside, paracord was inserted into the skirt waistband, cut, and the end melted with a candle flame. The skirt is now technically 100% done and I tried it on again. It is definitely about an inch or two shorter than I would like and hovers above my ankle bone. I still have time to mess with it and make adjustments. One option under consideration is to attack it from the top and remove the waistband and add another narrow strip between the waistband and the skirt. The other option is to go on a crash diet and lose a few pounds so the skirt naturally sits lower. That might actually be easier than tearing the top of the skirt apart. Ripping out those seams will be a huge ordeal. I was pretty focused when I sewed it and did durable seams that were stitched and then topstitched.

random thoughts – Day 2,242 (Thursday) – back in the zone

Thrift store brocade pants.

There were a couple days away from the sewing machine, but today I was back at it and it was good. It all started with a pair of pants found in a thrift shop after my bone density scan on Tuesday. They are a pinkish red with a heavy gold metallic pattern, which under much of my indoor lighting photographs as orange with gold. I thought the fabric would make a good costume top. They had a red tag, which was this week’s designated color for the blessed and glorious price of $1.29. I recently paid $12.99 a yard for gold metallic embellished fabric for the 25-yard skirt, so there was no way on earth I could walk away from the pants at that price.

They were not pants I would wear as is (or at all) which alleviated any guilt from chopping them up. When I tried them on, the silhouette was weird and they were puffy like a balloon from the waist to the crotch then the leg tapered with a beautifully executed notched deep hem.

This morning, the elastic waistband was cut off and all the seams were opened up. The pants had a lining, which was a bonus, because the top I was making called for a lining and it spared me finding coordinating fabric. The pants might have been homemade. There was no evidence of labels of any kind, and I noticed when taking them apart that the pants had been cut without consideration for the pattern. The fabric design ran in one direction on half the pants, and upside down on the other half, which wasn’t immediately obvious, but once I saw it, I couldn’t unsee it.

The project, like all the ones before it, took longer than expected. There were hiccups and hurdles, and pattern alterations and design decisions. I decided to keep the notched hem and the lower leg pieces were the perfect width for the sleeves, which would not need to be hemmed. I was mindful of the direction of the gold motif, which required extra care with pinning and cutting. The original plan was to add trim using the green and gold portion of the border from the saree I made the harem pants from the other day, but the pattern is just too much. If anything, it needs a solid trim to calm it down, not one with even more gold thread. There is still some work to be done, but it requires the procurement of a decorative closure for the front and possible trim for the bottom and neck edges, closure of one seam in the back, and the tidying up of thread ends.

Pants transformed to a costume top.

While I was ripping seams, altering and laying pattern pieces, then finally sewing, a two-hour music collection called “When Cello Meets Dark Techno – Dark NeoClassical Cello” played on YouTube. It was a great backdrop for the day’s work and was played on repeat multiple times. While working and grooving, ideas were popping in my brain for dances, designs, photography, writing, basically everything. A notepad was at my side to jot things down. It felt amazing to be “in the zone” again. It’s been ages (years!) and I’ve missed it. A lot. Seriously. It felt so good I could cry, but I didn’t because I’m still emotionally stunted.

The day wasn’t all slave labor (me) under a cruel taskmistress (me). There were at least two breaks. I stopped mid-day to roast broccoli and brussels sprouts and make packaged risotto for lunch. The rest of the lunch became sustenance at the supper break with the addition of a lobster cake. There are mixed feelings about having eaten a pound each of brussels sprouts and broccoli in one day, but it was over two meals and it could have been the less healthy things I gravitate towards. Perhaps the lesson is to buy (and roast) more brussels sprouts and broccoli. And buy magical brocade pants to chop up.

random thoughts – Day 2,241 (Wednesday) – pets and rain

Tuesday had a trip to Lowell for a bone density scan, today had a trip to Worcester for a hair trim. I am living large this week and mingling with the world. While leaving the driveway on Tuesday, I had the chance to meet Mindy, a neighbor who moved in “up the street” in November. For some reason, people are vague with saying where they live. When I met Marie, she said she lived “up the hill” which is funny because there are some slight inclines but nothing close to a proper hill here. Then again, I grew up in Fitchburg which is all hills and I am definitely biased concerning hills.

Anyway, Mindy was walking with her golden brown dog named Socks. I asked if "Socks" was because of her white paws, but Mindy said that was the dog’s name at the shelter and she and her husband didn’t want to change it when they adopted her. I get it, that is why Moose was called Moose.

Kiki on the bed!

The big news at my house involves Kiki, who was named "Stanley" and erroneously believed to be male at the shelter. I just couldn't call her that and "Kiki" popped out one morning while leaving for work when I meant to say "bye kitty kitty." 

Miss Kiki has begun sleeping on the bed while I am in it. It has taken two years and three months to arrive at this point, but for the past five nights she has hopped up onto the bed and cozied up for some strokes on her little dainty cheeks and shoulders. 

A couple times during these five nights she has walked across my neck with her tiny, lethal claws which was a bit uncomfortable, and I hope she’s not calculating how much pressure is needed to murder me in my sleep. It would be dumb move on her part, because I’m pretty sure she has no idea where the bag of her food is stored or how to open the pantry door.

Bountiful blossoms in the rain.

This morning, while backing out of the driveway, I noticed the bush at the corner of the house has many more dark pink flowers opened than Tuesday, and also that the wind had blown petals from the flowering tree onto the lawn and it looked like snow. I didn’t want to stop for pictures just then, and figured I’d get them when I got back home. Ha! The joke was on me. During my time in Worcester, it began to rain and it kept raining the rest of the afternoon. Any pale pink and white flower petals were pelted into the lawn when I got home, and I had no interest in standing in the rain to photograph a bush, but I did get a picture from the living room window. The bedroom windows are closer, but they have full-length screens and it’s hard to get decent pictures through a window screen. I have tried and failed at this many times.

random thoughts – Day 2,240 (Tuesday) – changes

When I had my annual visit with the primary care doctor several months ago, she referred me for a DEXA scan. I somehow missed this note. A week or so ago, a call came from Lowell General Hospital to schedule said scan before the referral expired. Today was the day.  

DEXA scan day.

Instead of the usual routing via Routes 2 and I-495, which must have been extra horrid, Waze navigated me through a series of small towns where the traffic was light and the roadsides were scenic. The routing swapped out stressful highways for rolling farmland, barns, dairy farms, a wedding venue, an ice cream stand, and quaint town centers. It was a beautiful.

The technician was fun to chat with and scan was over quickly. We covered a lot of topics, including lost medical records, aging parents, and living in the south versus the northeast. We both felt we were at our peak physical shape at 50 when she was running half-marathons and I was playing roller derby, but things have changed. I would love to have my derby legs, butt, and stamina again.

The hospital gift shop is located near the entrance and I always stop in on the way out. There was the usual hospital gift shop items of stuffed animals and balloons on sticks and personal care items. Today, there were extra special surprises with a window display featuring rhinestone encrusted hard shell evening bags. A rack with logo sweatshirts included sequin shawls. Shelves displayed items for the upcoming parental celebration days for mothers and fathers.

The version of me from the 1990s through about 2018 would have pulled out a credit card and bought a fancy purse and a sequin shawl or two without a second thought. That version of me also had a high likelihood (or reasonable hope) of using said fancy items at dressy company Christmas parties, New Year’s Eve shindigs, or any number of fundraiser galas. Today’s version of me resisted. For one thing, the memory of all the fancy handbags and shawls and jackets that live untouched in boxes and closets is still fresh because it wasn’t that long ago all that stuff was moved into the new house. And now my blingy desires have changed and are regulaly met with belly dance costumes.

random thoughts – Day 2,239 (Monday) – annoyances and sewing

 This morning was one of those times where everything was annoying. Every. Single. Thing.

When looking at my budget spreadsheet, the row markers on the left of the screen didn’t correspond to the actual cell address rows. Why? No idea. Did they ever? Also no idea. But when I’m in a cell with an address of Column F Row 67, the guide on the far left should not be showing a label for Row 12. 

Then, a reminder arrived that the Internet/Cable bill is due soon. Cool. I forgot, so thanks. Went to the website to review the bill, because I haven't done so lately, and it was a three-ring circus of hoop jumping to log in and finally find a listing of the charges and what is included my stupid bundled package. There was swearing.

An effort to find some specific fabric online for a specific costume part was undertaken after receiving an email that fabric is 30% off at a certain hobby and craft store I happen to despise which is 30 minutes from home but is one of the few still in existence. An online search of the fabric was so frustrating and time consuming I could have driven to the store and been touching fabric before I got a single result on the screen. I bailed from the site. There was swearing.

And on it went. The laptop screen was speckled and spotty and wouldn’t wipe clean. The window shade got stuck. The bass-playing neighbor was at it for hours and I could hear it in my house with all the doors and windows shut. (I think I may take up trombone or mizmar or marching band giant drum to even the score.) 

Sweatshop, reopened.

In an effort to have one accomplishment for the day and knock an item off the sewing to-do list, I decided to boldly cut the pink floral saree fabric and make the harem pants to go under the too sheer skirt for one of the dances in the June show. It was not as straightforward as I imagined. The fabric is slippery so pinning the pattern took longer than it would with other fabric. Planning was needed to incorporate the metallic edging of the fabric to minimize cutting. 

When it was time to cut, changing the blade in the rotary cutter required a cutting tool to open the packaging of the cutting tool. After being cut, the fabric edges frayed almost immediately. There was swearing (lots!).

Pants completed.

During the sewing, the side seams puckered, which I didn’t notice until after finishing enclosed seams on both pant legs. The sadistic pattern companies design the waistband casings to be barely larger than the width of elastic they recommend, and the elastic never fits through at least one spot in the casing. I ended up using one-inch instead of two-inch wide elastic. There was swearing. 

I had to stop working on the pants for a couple hours and went back to the coin bra (still not finished). When I went to the couch for hand sewing, the scissors were over by the sewing machine and it ticked me off, because that was the ruling mood of the day. 

It took twice as long to make the stupid pants as it should have and I was ready to swear off sewing forever.  When they were finished (after 9:00 pm), I felt better and the aggravation had finally subsided.

Now that the sewing machine is hogging the dining table again, I guess another project will be undertaken. I still need a top for under the sheer top that will go with the sheer skirt. Costuming was definitely not this complicated last year.