random thoughts – Day 1,415 – (Wednesday) – booking it

And just like that, January is over. Although, we weren’t really that lucky, and it wasn’t done just like that. It was a month that felt about as long as a year, until the last couple days when it oddly and suddenly felt like it had flown by. So weird.

At work, we have launched from busy into busier. Those are the only two speeds we seem to operate at. The length of the to-do list at my desk seems to double daily and today I was hustling. Spreadsheets, word documents, ad copy, layout PDFs, edits, website article review and posting, emails, meetings. Oy. It was both exhausting and exhilarating. And a little bit stressful.

February and March book club.

There was a quick break with a walk out in the brisk air to LaLa Books to pick up the March book club book that arrived (How to Build a Boat, by Elaine Feeney). I’m halfway through the February book (No Land to Light On, by Yara Zgheib) for the meeting next week. It’s beautifully written, but I can read it only in small doses because it’s about a tough situation. It’s set in Boston and Syria, during the time of the January 27, 2017 “Executive Order 13769 Protecting the Nation from Foreign Terrorist Entry into The United States.” It’s a little weird reading about things date-stamped seven years earlier than the same date I’m reading them. 

I wish I could take a month off to just hole up and read. It miss the summers when I was a kid – days flung on the couch with my head deep in a book. I would raid the bookcases, hijack Mom's Book of the Month Club arrivals, and supplement it all with library books. I can’t wait to retire so I can lay around and read all day, every day.

random thoughts – Day 1,414 – (Tuesday) – american dream

In the late 80s and early 90s there was a song by The Godfathers that I liked called, “Birth, School, Work, Death.” I haven’t thought about this song for ages, but lately, the title phrase has been randomly popping into my head and rattling around. Over and over and over.

But hey, it’s the American Dream, right? Birth, school, work, death. And in the cracks between, there are the less dreamy bills, laundry, grocery shopping, and home maintenance.

Tonight, after work-work, after supper, I vacuumed. Super fun housework. No, really.

I was chilly most of the day despite wearing a fleece pullover and a hat and I figured the activity would warm me up. Or the aggravation as the cord is driven over and the vacuum eats the area rugs. Whether from activity or aggravation, either way, I would be less cold and that would be a win.

Potential source of injury?

The most exciting part of any vacuuming adventure is lugging the awkward and slightly heavy vacuum up and down the stairs while trying to avoid a fall or injury. The last thing I need or want is an accident caused by a vacuum cleaner, but more than a few times, there has been the imagined vision of myself in a crumpled heap at the bottom of the stairs, trapped under the Bissel Power Clean Swivel Rewind Pet machine, bought when there were pets.

While vacuuming upstairs, as the four words “Birth, School, Work, Death” danced around the edges, a less musical memory entered my head. It was from the college days. I was dating a guy whose brother was a lawyer, and I was helping him clean the brother’s law office after hours. Vacuuming the carpeting came with very specific instructions to back out of the room while vacuuming so there would be no footprints or vacuum tracks left in the wall-to-wall carpeting.

It seemed a bit neurotic and nit-picky at the time, but that is pretty much how I’ve vacuumed carpeting ever since.  It looks nice and fresh until it’s walked on, which happens in my bedroom when I have to get to the outlet in the closet to unplug the vacuum.  It’s a lovely five seconds of pristine carpet fiber. Another sliver of the American Dream.

random thoughts – Day 1,413 – (Monday) – shades of gray

Gray morning sky.

Today felt like we are turning the corner. Sunrise was at 7:04. Sunset was at 4:54, and at 5:16 this evening, it was still quite light out. Spring is 50 days away and counting.

At 8:00 a.m., while outside shoveling paths to the car, mailbox, gate, and driveways, the sun shone on the houses across the street from The BungaLowell, against a smooth sky that looked like the nicest shade of an old-timey, classic gray three-season wool business suit. 

The snow was heavy, wet, and dense. At the second shovel full of the stuff, something twinged in my back. It was good sticky snow, great for sculptures, but there was no time for that before work. Minimal shoveling was done before I was back inside the house logging in for work.

Gray evening sky.

After work, the sky was a different shade of gray than the morning, with more cloud texture. The windows of the homes behind mine radiated with a golden interior illumination. 

Out front, the puddle at the end of the driveway was a cold dark gray, murky and a couple inches deep, and I tried to step around it to retrieve the trash bin from the street. The puddle is two cars wide, so the bin route often involves dragging the bin through the neighbor’s part of the shared driveway and looping back into my own. The snow and slush along the neighbor’s side of the driveway was so dense that it was easier to drag the bin through the mucky puddle than take it over and through the neighbor’s slush heap. 

It’s a good thing I’m a little rugged. Of course, it’s not like it’s a choice or anything, it’s a matter of necessity.

Supper!

The infatuation with the cast iron fry pan continues and supper was a colorful arrangement of brussels sprouts, broccoli, carrots, onion, Kalamata olives, and mushrooms sautéed in butter and oil, with a splash of balsamic vinegar and a sprinkling of feta cheese. There was enough made for two meals, but the first bowl tasted like more and soon it was all gone. It took less than 20 minutes to make, and soon I was on the couch, watching the latest streaming obsession, a Spanish thriller telenovela called Pact of Silence (Pacto de Silencio en espanol). 

Good food, good Netflix, good times. And spring will be here soon. 

random thoughts – Day 1,412 – (Sunday) – slow day

Crispy rainy snowy world.

Another day, another weather event. Today’s forecast for freezing rainy snowy stuff caused the cancellation of the morning dance class to spare us from potentially bad driving home from class in the stuff. Several of us drive 45 to 60 minutes, from every direction of the compass. 

Instead of driving to dance class, I drove around the corner to the gym. A cold, crispy kind of frozen rain pinged off the windshield as I drove. The gym at 8:30 on a Sunday morning was kind of quiet. 

Fun read!

Instead of being tied to the TV screens for entertainment, I brought a book to read while on the treadmill (Everybody in my Family has Killed Someone, by Benjamin Stevenson). It's by an "award-winning stand-up comedian and author" and the writing style is entertaining. The time flew by. Back in the olden days of grad school, I used to take my textbooks and read homework while doing 45 minutes on the Stair Master. After the treadmill today, ten glorious minutes were enjoyed in a massage chair.

Despite the big declaration a few days ago of, “oh, I bought a big pizza and don’t need to go to the grocery store, aren't I so smart and clever” I ended up at Market Basket. The quest was broccoli and brussels sprouts for roasting, and Bisquick, the key to the quiche recipe I like to make. It was a quick trip.

As I left MB, the rain mix was more on the snow side and the air was full of plump flakes. It snowed enough to coat everything in a pretty fluffy coating before it went back to rain. Then it was back to snow. this went on all day. While putting away the MB purchases and thinking about tossing the veggies in olive oil and roasting them in the oven, it was realized that I forgot to buy olive oil. So much for that plan. For today, anyway.

For supper, biscuit mode kicked in and a batch was baked to accompany soup for supper. It is rare that I make biscuits, and I can't recall the last time any were baked that didn't pop out of a carboard tube. The baking lesson of the day was that dark, non-stick cookie sheets will brown/scorch the bottom of a biscuit before the tops achieve the desired “golden brown.” 

The afternoon was slow and relaxed with snowy day activities. Like laundry and Netflix, mostly, but that is the tale for most weekends. The best part about winter laundry is sitting with the load in lap, warm from the dryer, while folding the items.

The lounging around the house parts of the day was guilt-free due to the snow, which wasn’t even that bad yet. Most of the forecasts called for the assorted precipitation to come in several waves throughout the day with the worst of it overnight and stopping Monday morning. It seems to be playing out that way. 

random thoughts – Day 1,411 – (Saturday) – mops and dolls

For weeks, the calendar for today has borne the entry “Finnish Breakfast – Saima.” I look forward to the monthly breakfast to meet up with my cousin, Mom, StepDad, and friends and their families. Friday night, I talked with Mom and texted with cousin M about breakfast.

This morning, the alarm sounded and rudely startled me out of a dream that instantly vanished. The time was 7:00 and the problem was I had neglected to adjust the alarm to the Saturday Finnish breakfast 6:00 alarm time. I was already late. Craptastic. 

If I rushed like hell, there was no way I could shower, dress, and drive there in time. Even skipping the shower and wearing a hat wouldn’t defeat the time-space continuum. There would be no Finnish breakfast for me. Barely awake, I called Mom to let her know I wouldn’t be joining the table. 

Current product  obsession.

Not driving the 35 miles for breakfast and then spending time puttering around in Fitchburg freed up the morning for the leisurely drinking of coffee. Reading the news of the day. Going to the gym. These things, like many elements of the workday, expanded to fill the time available and soon, it was noon and thoughts of lunch entered the cranium. Food is often (too often) the focus of any given day.

While at the gym, of the 20-million TV screens lined up on the wall opposite the rows of bikes, stair steppers, and treadmills, I was mesmerized by one screen. For 30 minutes I watched an infomercial about a steam mop that cleans basically everything and kills 99% of germs and bacteria. Partway through the program, I grabbed my phone for a quick Google search of the mop (the H2OX5) so it would be in the search history and I could find it quickly later. 

Back at home and entertaining myself with the phone, the ads were suddenly all about steam mops, and there are a lot of them. Time was spent (Invested? Wasted?) reading reviews of various mops and the ability to clean grout and tile and lay flat to go under a couch, which is a trait the vacuum lacks. A steam mop is probably in my near future.

Knickerbocker Holly Hobbie dolls in search of a new home.

The afternoon shifted gears and involved digging out a bag of dolls from when I was a kid and writing sales tags. They will go into Mom’s new booth at the antiques co-op, and from there, hopefully to new homes. The dining room table is now covered in old shortbread and biscuit tins, books, dolls, and assorted kitchen items. 

A shoe box crammed with Barbie, Ken, and Twiggy doll clothes was reviewed and it was a walk down memory lane. Clothes Mom made from scraps of her own garments were mixed in with the official Mattel items. Barbie has gowns, jumpsuits, and matched business suits, and Twiggy has the perfect 1960s mini dresses. 

The weirdest wardrobe items are Ken’s and include multiple pairs of pajamas and a bathrobe, which might be reminiscent of High Hefner except for being flannel and imprinted with cowboys. For daywear, my Ken has a tan corduroy suit and a trenchcoat.  He is clearly unprepared to escort Barbie anywhere in her gowns. Had I only known as a kid that my Barbie and Ken were foreshadowing my reality as a married person.

The timing of the booth availability is perfect for the 2024 goal of cleaning out the junk room and converting it to the long absent guest room. Of course, this goal has appeared on every list of annual goals since buying The BungaLowell in 2016, but let’s not go too deep into that. Maybe this year is finally the year.

random thoughts – Day 1,410 – (Friday) – dreams and musings

The dream right before it was time to wake up was interesting. I was in a crowded house, but more like an older adult family gathering than a fun friends party. A friend I knew while in Tennessee was there, as well as another friend from Long Island from decades earlier than Tennessee. I was looking for my suitcase (I’m almost always looking for something in dreams – a missing shoe, my passport, boarding pass). Instead of finding the suitcase in the room where I thought I had left it, I found partially eaten boxes of assorted chocolates. 

Puddle corner.

And then the alarm went off and it was nothing but a dark room and the sound of rain. Ugh. No more rain. Please. Stop. A check of the basement showed it was dry except for one corner.

When it was time to leave for work, the gutter over the front door was dripping like a decorative water feature in a restaurant or hotel lobby. A puddle an inch or more deep had collected next to the front steps in the flower bed where the bleeding heart usually explodes from the space. Another had formed in front of the steps. Over at the foot of the driveway, the usual pond-sized puddle was there, just like it is every time it rains. 

The top priority home maintenance and repair list is looking like a larger capacity sump pump and new gutters. Cha-ching! Both come with questions and complications. Can’t hardly wait. Bye, bye 2024 vacation. It was nice thinking we might be a thing. Adulting is totally overrated.

Afternoon treats.

At the office, right around the point in the afternoon that I was thinking how great it would be to have something chocolatey, a tray of treats magically appeared. Ok, it wasn’t really magic, not like a Las Vegas show or anything. The beautiful reality was that the head of the department had been at a forever long meeting and returned with the tray of leftover desserts. 

Those of us in the office were blessed with chocolate frosted brownies, blond brownies, oatmeal chocolate chip cookie, coconut chocolate nut layered bars and some other thing that seemed to be dried apricots and cashews. Some days things are mostly mediocre, but turn around and improve like magic. 

The rain stopped and after work the basement was still holding steady and mostly dry. I have never been so obsessed with a mostly empty concrete room as I have the past few months with all the wet weather. I need a good, long drought so I can shift my obsession to something more fun. Almost anything will do, but it would be nice to dwell on something not costing thousands of dollars that doesn’t also include spa services and waiters bringing fancy beverages adorned with colorful fruit and little umbrellas. Is that too much to ask? Just wondering.

random thoughts – Day 1,409 – (Thursday) – food skills

It was a pleasant Thursday. The weather was above freezing and the slab of ice on the front step was soft enough to smash and clear with no swearing required.

Work moved along smoothly. The things in my sphere of control anyway. Earlier this week, parts for three projects were sent to various departments for additional information or review and approvals so they can move to the next step under my control, so the usual waiting game is underway.

Lunch soup.

As if a decent work day wasn’t stellar enough, the food was also pretty spectacular. Lunch featured a freezer excavated homemade vegetable soup with fresh grated cheddar and kalamata bread with a schmear of butter. Oddly, I was in the mood for a biscuit to accompany the soup, but I'm not some biscuit-making Southern Belle, although I did sort-of try that for a dozen years. A slice of bread from the freezer was the best I could deliver on a quick lunch break.

Supper was inspired by an email from the preferred pizza purveyor with a “you haven’t ordered in ages, here is a 25% off coupon.” I’m not too proud to say I love a discount and took the bait. According to the shop’s “recent orders” feature, I hadn’t ordered from them since October 6. Holy moley, where does the time go? No wonder the pizza shop missed me. I used to order from them every two or three weeks. They probably thought I ran away or something. I can't even fathom that I went that long without ordering a pizza.

The order of a large cheese pizza and a Beyond Burger basket was placed via online ordering which is my favorite way to order pretty much everything because I don’t have to call and speak to anyone. And the cleared front step meant the delivery person could get to the door without breaking their neck. 

Beyond Burger basket portion
of the pizza shop "groceries."

The large supper order for one person was a strategic maneuver.  Eight slices of pizza mean many future meals are covered and can add diversity to the soup streak. Even better, I can skip the grocery store this weekend. 

The Beyond Burger came with a ton of sweet potato fries and a side salad. The burger was eaten for supper and most of the fries were saved for a future meal. The salad and a slice of pizza were set aside for Friday’s lunch. Meal planning issues are solved and a grocery trip eliminated with technology and a strategic delivery. All I had to do was tap some keys. I hoped my MBA schooling would further my career, but I never thought it would be so useful for supper logistics, leftovers planning, and strategic grocery store avoidance. 

random thoughts – Day 1,408 – (Wednesday) – snow fresh

Snow fresh.

It snowed overnight – just enough to give everything a fresh coat of fluffy whiteness for the morning get up time. It was pretty. 

The technological wonder that is remote start warmed the car up for the ride. A path a shovel width wide was cleared from the back door to the car. Bunny tracks dotted the snow in a line from the driveway into the back yard. The snow was easy to brush off the car and in no time and right on time, I was on my way.

Slow going.

The ride to work had plenty of time for sightseeing and admiring the lightly coated trees that seemed to merge into the gray sky. The traffic was horrible. After rounding the corner from Riverside to Lakeview, it wasn’t very far before it was bumper to bumper vehicles barely moving. The roads weren't that bad and there was no apparent cause for the traffic situation. Maybe the cloud of stupidity had parked over Lowell and overtaken the minds of the drivers. 

Waze was consulted for an escape route, but many of the streets are dead ends and the options were few. After 16 minutes of barely moving, Waze showed an estimate of 12 minutes to cover the remaining 1.2 miles. Ugh. 

In all, it took 35 minutes to get from home to the garage, a distance of roughly two miles. This was a new record. Unofficial. There was no actual stopwatch in effect.

Fresh snowfall.

Because I was already late upon landing downtown there was no reason to rush during the walking portion of the trip to the office. I looked at the snowy trees as I took a slower pace on the slippery sidewalks. The snow on the roof at Saint Anne's Episcopal highlighted the shingles and some dips and waves in the roof. The snow on the trees blended in with the gray sky. The greenery in the flower boxes atop the brick wall near the bank was powdered with snow. 

It was a refreshing change from the usual footrace to take a breath, slow down, and look around. The traffic was good for something after all. 

random thoughts – Day 1,407 – (Tuesday) – seasons

It was warmer today and the temperature hit the 40s. Practically bikini season. The icy snow got soft, and bits of grass could be seen in the back yard. The basement remains dry and I remain calm. The middle step out front, under the dripping gutter, is still encased in ice.

The barrage of emails from Omaha Steaks, which began around Thanksgiving, continues. Every day there is an email from the rotation of specials that are the same as the specials all through the holiday shopping season. Apparently, meat specials season lasts forever. 

Extended warranty with
no-name companies season!

The Postal mail delivered two urgent letters. One is from “2017 Jeep Renegade Latitude – Official Business” and the other from “Vehicle Services Division.” Neither has a return address, just some operating hours in the central time zone, and both requesting my response to “IMPORTANT VEHICLE PROTECTION INFORMATION.” Clearly, it’s the made up and mythical extended warranty season, which ends on either January 29 or February 7. Whew! I was worried I might have missed it. 

Sofie.

The evening entertainment is a Swedish series called Love and Anarchy, a romantic comedy television series set in the office of a publishing company. The place is headed by an indecisive and spineless "leader." It’s a departure from the dark and gritty European and Scandinavian crime dramas set in the dead of winter that I usually watch. This one seems to be set in the spring with no snow. There are some funny moments, along with some poignant ones.

Favorite line of the moment, delivered at a spa by a friend to the lead character Sofie: “…. And I started seeing a great behavioral therapist who’s taught me not to think and feel so much all the time, so any time a feeling or a thought makes me unhappy, I have a superb toolkit that helps me stop feeling everything. Now I feel nothing. Honestly, I feel nothing. It’s amazing. Do you want her number?” 

Holy hell, people pay money to feel nothing? I’ve been basically dead inside and feeling practically nothing for ages and I didn’t have to pay a cent. I have sometimes been worried about it, but now I kind of want to just move to Sweden. 

Of course, I should probably learn some Swedish first. Spanish is going well on Duolingo, Finnish frustrated me to the point of setting it aside for a while, but Swedish …. That could be fun. Maybe. We’ll see.

random thoughts – Day 1,406 – (Monday) –burnt dust and thick ice

Over the past couple days, I kept smelling something odd in the house. It was slightly electrical, but not really, and the best description I could come up with was burnt dust. It was most noticeable in the living room, but that might be because that is where I spend time after work, sitting quietly, doing not much, and there is bandwidth available to notice a weird smell. 

Gray, cracked ice, because dusty
air filters are gross to photograph.

A couple times, I walked around the house sniffing the air like a dog in search of a source. I went downstairs and sniffed the basement. I even ventured outside to unplug the heating system that runs through the gutters, imagining that I was smelling a slow and gradual burn of the roof. 

When the furnace made an unusual noise that resembled the washing machine at the end of the spin cycle, it finally occurred to me to check the furnace air filter. And there it was – all gray and gross and fully loaded with dust. Yuck. I couldn’t remember the last time I changed it. The filthy thing was tied up in a bag and deposited into the trash bin. 

The front steps want to kill me.

In the couple hours since, the furnace has seemed quieter and the air no longer had the weird scent. It was an almost immediate improvement. Or maybe I imagined it all in the thrill of discovery and victory over a routine household task. 

Next up in the homeowner’s mystery series, the case of the leaking gutter. Why does the gutter over the steps and front door keep leaking and coating the steps in thick, impenetrable, dangerous ice? 

random thoughts – Day 1,405 – (Sunday) – air and chills

Brrrr. Chilly.

The weather is still cold, but it's still winter so it should be expected to be freezing. This morning had the cheery temperature of 13 dry degrees, but hey, the "Real Feel" was 15 degrees, so that was a bonus. 

Starting the car delivered the colorful dashboard graphic/lecture about low tire pressure. Again. It’s the third time since the first cold snap of the fall that I’ve received this blessing and had to go in search of an air machine. The fun part is the variety of machines. Some take quarters only. Some take bills. Some take cards. Some are out of order. 

My cars before the Jeep lacked the super modern, sophisticated (expensive) technology that monitors everything, and there are days I kind of miss that. It was nice driving around without messages flashing at me. Usually, I would either notice a low tire, the car would start driving weird, or someone in a parking lot would point out the low tire. It was all very quiet, peaceful, and free of red illuminated graphics.

When the low tire message comes on, it is in some kind of automotive mumbo jumbo. Usually it’s the driver front tire that suddenly shows as “190” with the instruction to “inflate to 240.” Neither of these numbers resemble the recommended 35 psi listed on the inside of the driver’s door. The front tire reading changed to 210 as I drove.

Luckily the air pumps default to the magical 35, and today I learned from the reading on the air machine that the 210/220 on the dashboard (by the time I got to the gas station) equals 31 on the air machine screen. Cool, cool.

Spicy supper.
Chills followed.

The other quirky bit of knowledge learned today involves spicy food. Recent food fixations have been focused on rice and veggies mixed with hot salsa and cheese, or rice and veggies with Korean hot pepper paste and sriracha. I love spicy food, but lately I’ve noticed that after I eat it, I get chills, which is kind of the opposite condition I expected. Of course, I turned to Google like any modern adult functioning in a cyber-rich world. 

At a site called Healthline.com, along with several other corroborating sources, I read, “While eating spicy foods can provide a warming effect in your mouth, it may actually cause a slight decrease in your body temperature. Chilis like jalapeño, habanero, and cayenne contain a chemical called capsaicin. This compound is responsible for chili peppers’ spicy kick. When capsaicin is ingested, the brain sends a message to your body that it’s overheated.” Well hot damn. Or in my case, too cool. Chili makes me chilly. My usual body temperature is 97 and change, and it really doesn’t need to go any lower.

It seems I should limit the spicy food to the hot weather months when I may want to cool down a few notches. Or, I could keep eating dinner then running to wrap up in a blanket, which is a cozy finish to things. 

Tonight's tasty spicy blend was rice, vegetarian “beef” tips, vegetarian “sausage,” onion, and carrot dressed with soy sauce, Korean hot pepper paste, sriracha and sesame oil. Delicious! And followed immediately by chills. If I keep this spicy food kick going, I may end up with hypothermia.

random thoughts – Day 1,404 – (Saturday) – food and dance

The cold continues, which made for a perfect day to stay inside and do not a lot of anything. The day’s domestic accomplishments included unloading the dishwasher, from which the dishes have been kind of cloudy recently. The tinsel trees from Christmas were finally brought down to the basement. Movies were watched.

Lazy? Probably, although it was also “saving my energy.” There were evening dinner plans with dancer friends at Athenian Corner. One of them knew one of the dancers performing tonight. The hard part today was waiting for it to be time to go. The time spent avoiding going out into the cold left time to review the restaurant menu online and also to potentially talk myself out of it for no good reason other than being, well, lazy. Luckily that didn’t happen, and at the designated time I was at the restaurant.

On Saturday nights, Athenian Corner has live music and belly dancers and they always have good food. There were eight at our table. The dancers were lively and the band sounded great. I’m always amazed at dancers who perform with live music because I’m terrified of it. There is enough stress interacting with an audience, never mind the musicians. 

Dancing with a tray of lit candles.

One of the dancers tonight danced with a tray on her head which held several lit candles. There were turns and elevation changes and at one point she was on the floor and I was holding my breath. The tray stayed parallel to the floor the whole time. It was amazing. Nothing fell, unlike the time I danced with one fake candle and it launched off my head.

It was a fun night, being out with other grownups, dining and watching the dancers. The cold outside was forgotten for a while.

random thoughts – Day 1,403 – (Friday) – location

The ten location photo shoots for the annual report are done with the final two done today. Whew!

Several shoots involved trucks and being outdoors, including the one this morning. The temperature was in the 20-something range so it was a bit chilly. Brisk even. The afternoon shoot also involved trucks, but they were in a big garage so it was less freezing.

I was not in a lake,
but Jeep navigation thought I was.

This week, we had two shoots in Lowell during the snowstorm. Today’s two shoots were a bit far flung with one in Derry, NH followed by the other in Sterling, MA. The tally for this week was six photo shoots in four days that took us to locations including a swimming pool, a plumbing company, and a school.

This is a once-a-year project, and since I've been working on it, this is the earliest we've gotten the photos all done. Right around the time I was feeling over it all, it was all over.

The navigation system in the Jeep has gone rogue twice this week. On Sunday, it showed me as being on Route 495 when I was a good half-hour away from that road. Today, leaving Derry, it showed me ambling around New Hampshire in areas with no actual roads and then literally in a lake, when I was really on Route 113 in Dracut and then in my driveway in Lowell. So weird. Every day is an adventure. 

Easter, Valentine's Day,
and leftover Christmas.

At first, the map was up because it’s easier to see the street names on the larger dashboard screen than on the phone. Then, when it went all haywire, I was curious to see how long it would stay weird, even though I knew where I was going. During the hour or so between today’s driving journeys, it sorted itself.

In other tidbits, while shopping for tin foil and freezer bags in Family Dollar, I saw that the Seasonal Aisle had the combination of a box of thick peppermint candy cane Christmas leftovers mixed in the display with the Valentine Candy (which makes sense) and the pastel dreamscape of Easter candy and plush bunnies (two+ months from now). It must be almost time for the Independence Day goods to appear.  

random thoughts – Day 1,402 – (Thursday) – hills and memories

Passing the cemetery.

Today’s photo shoot adventure took me to the homeland. Fitchburg. Waze routed me down Route 2 to Mt. Elam Road, a winding road with lots of trees. I went past Forest Hill Cemetery where Mummu was laid to rest in the only piece of land she ever owned. As a kid, my friends and I rode bikes there and hung out on the stone wall in the summer. Across the street from the cemetery was my old junior high school. 

The drive down Rollstone Street took me past the places where my friends and classmates lived. The houses where Darlene, Judy, Cindy, Julie, and Beth lived, then the apartment building where Mummu lived and I spent many weekends of my youth, then after that, the small house where Mummu and Mom lived when Mom was a kid.

There was the red stone church where I was baptized, confirmed, and married, and around the Upper Common, the hills near where I lived until I was ten. As I drove up Prospect Street, I remembered riding my pink and white, one-speed bike up that street, but couldn’t for the life of me figure out how I managed it. We kids must have been in good shape, and I’m 100% sure I couldn’t make that hill on a bike today, and it would be a challenge on foot.

Heading down the hill.

After the shoot, I drove slowly down the hill admiring the steeples of two churches and the hills beyond. Passing the older homes with the cool views I imagined that it must be pretty amazing to live in one of them, and especially when they were new in Fitchburg’s early days. 

My family lived in this chunk of town until I was ten, and the big older homes were the types  I dared to imagine living in as I passed by on my bike. I’ve always loved the old homes and the hills and the views. I get edgy when the landscape is too flat. 

Most trips to Fitchburg are filled with memories and melancholy. Time has softened the edges of many memories and roughened the appearance of many of the locations. Or maybe they always looked rough and I just didn’t know it at the time because I was young and idealistic and having fun.

random thoughts – Day 1,401 – (Wednesday) –sunshine and light

It was cold, with temperatures in the 20s, but the blue sky and bright sunshine took some of the edge off. And it was great that there was nothing falling from the sky.

The remote start feature currently ties for “favorite car accessory” with the heated seat. This morning, it was so cold that even with the engine running for 10 minutes and the heater on, the doors were frozen shut. I slammed the edge of the front door with my hand and then it opened, but the back door wasn’t budging. The work bag was deposited on the seat, and a gymnastics feat executed to get the snow brush/scraper from the floor of the back seat for the clearing of the roof.

Night trees.

The drive to work started out well with light traffic, but about a half mile from home I realized I’d forgotten my carefully assembled lunch of chicken and roasted vegetables on the counter. If it sat all day while I was gone it would have to be tossed. Funds are low until payday, so buying lunch was out of the question. 

It was decided. The point of no return had not been reached yet, so I grabbed a left turn and headed back to the house. Seven minutes after leaving, I was back in the kitchen grabbing the lunch container. 

What a difference seven minutes makes. Leaving the house for the second time put me into significantly heavier traffic than before. It still wasn’t the worst traffic ever, just heavier than a few minutes earlier. It confirmed that I have found the sweet spot for departure. A few minutes earlier or a few minutes later means a much longer journey with a lot more grumbling.

At the garage, the car window was frozen and wouldn’t lower. Swiping my card required putting the car in park, opening the door, unclasping the seat belt, hanging out of the gap in the door and waving my card. Super fun.

Evening glow on
Merrimack.

Around noon, while driving to a photo shoot, any time a corner was turned, the dashboard would alert me that a door was open. At a red light I opened and closed the driver’s door but at the next corner, the light came on again. The back door, that had been frozen shut hours earlier, was now thinking it was open. At the destination, I still had a hard time opening the door that claimed to be open. When it finally opened, I gave it a satisfying slam to shut it again.

The daylight is lingering a bit longer each day and just before 5:00 the last bits of light were clinging to the day. It was closer to 5:30 when I left the office and hit Merrimack Street and the cold, crisp evening air. The sidewalks were a combination of cleared to the concrete and stone slabs, followed by sections coated with an inch or so of dirty, sloppy snow.

The white lights in the trees are still lit, creating a cozy glow through downtown. The cleared sidewalks in front of the bank were a bit wet and reflected the traffic and car lights. Further down, restaurant windows glowed with light. The bakery cases shone with macarons and cupcakes. The new Vietnamese restaurant still has a tree  in the window, loaded with colorful decorations. It had a small-town charm to it and made for a pretty walk to the garage. 

random thoughts – Day 1,400 – (Tuesday) – more weather

The weather is really putting on a show lately. The overnight/early morning shift produced snow flakes that covered the untreated surfaces in a fresh, fluffy white coating. The street had been treated, but that can last only so long, and at 4:00 am, a plow rumbled down the street, pushing snow to the embankment that marks the official and final dead end.

There were two location photo shoots today, and they were both in Lowell. This was lucky for me with the weather, and less lucky for our photographer who is based in New Hampshire. There was the morning workout of shoveling a path to the car, and the removal of snow from the car. The ride was just a couple miles, but it was messy and slow going. 

There was a gap several hours between the shoots, and I was back at the remote desk. One of the first emails seen this morning was a request to change the scheduling of one of the shoots later in the week, so that needed to be buttoned up.  

Hooray for hot lunch!

There was the perfect winter day lunch of veggie soup made from the homemade broth, topped with grated cheddar and a side of bread with butter. Of course, winter room temperature butter isn't super soft and tears the bread a bit, but it still tastes good.

The snow kept falling. The world’s most dedicated smoker hung out the window, smoking and coughing his deep, phlegmy cough as the snow fell around him and onto him. 

There were several other tasks handled before it was time to shovel the path again and clear off the car again. The snow fell steadily during the drive and the photo shoot. As I left the shoot, it was changing to the crispy frozen granular rain that makes a lot of noise when it hits the windshield and the roof.

The driving was worse than in the morning. Sloppy. Slippery. The Merrimack is high and enthusiastically flowing and churning. A drought right about now would be okay with me.

It was great to be back at the desk, safe, warm, and dry for the rest of the afternoon. It’s supposed to be in the 20s overnight and most of the rest of the week, so there won’t be any melting happening. As long as stuff stops falling from the sky for a while, that would be cool.

random thoughts – Day 1,399 – (Monday) – back

Looking back, I never intended to blow off the gym. From July into October, going to the gym was a regular event that involved either riding the recumbent bike or walking on the treadmill, with brief side trips to the 30-minute circuit training room for some or all of the machines (usually very few). The reward part of the trip was ten minutes on either the hydromassage bed or the massage chair.

Much of the motivation was fitting into the sequin pants bought for my niece’s wedding in Vegas, and it was a success. Specific goals help a lot. The week in Vegas to attend the wedding involved minimal physical activity and the fitness habit completely derailed. Upon returning, there was one visit to the gym each month in October, November, and December. Not very impressive.

The first week of the new year, the gym was avoided under the expectation it would be crowded with people and their New Year’s resolutions. There were a few mornings where I optimistically told myself I’d go to the gym after work and then at 5:00, forgot that was the “plan.”

Today, I was back on the treadmill. While drinking coffee I remembered I belong to the gym. The app for the gym has a “crowd meter” that shows how busy it is. This morning it was wasn’t too busy and I made a break for it. The odds were in my favor. There was a parking space near the door. There were open treadmills. The cardio room wasn’t crowded and there was no wait on any of the machines I wanted to use, nor on the massage chair. It was perfect.

There were stretches of years where I had the discipline of a true athlete. There were regular and dedicated workout schedules with various combinations of cardio, weights, road biking, kick boxing, yoga, skiing, roller derby, and assorted flavors of dance. And it was fun, or at least something that resembled fun. 

How I love you,
massage chair.

Some of the personal fitness eras were probably less about discipline and perfection and more about burning off stress, anger, and frustration with life, love, and career. Working out like a fiend bridged the crises of turning 30, then 40, then 50. It helped burn off the stress and pain of divorces and breakups, sh*tty jobs with great managers, and great jobs with sh*tty managers. There were side benefits like confidence when out and about in work and social situations. 

Now, it’s more about not keeling over when I climb a flight of stairs. Keeping the joints moving because the physical therapist said so. And not feeling and looking like total crap (just kind of crap-light). You know, so the sweat pants fit when sitting home alone watching Netflix. That's a good reason to go back. Right? And my bestie, the massage chair. That's really the best reason to be back there.

random thoughts – Day 1,398 – (Sunday) – routines

Dance class started for the winter session, one week late due to the storm last weekend. The snow delay worked out for me due to the sciatica situation which was pretty bad last Sunday and likely would have prevented me from attending. The pain ran for around 12 days, which involved a lot of treatment with tennis balls and ice packs, and then it resolved itself. It was great to be back in the studio routine with warmups, stretching, and the shimmies and hip slides.

New snow coating.

The weather forecast wheel of fortune for today landed on “snow squalls” and I was on the lookout for flakes. Snow began fluttering in the cold air as I returned from Market Basket after dance, but it was a mostly false alarm and there was nothing falling from the sky for a while. 

The soup kettle was put on the stove and filled with the contents of three freezer bags of vegetable trimmings – onion skins, carrot ends, broccoli stems, and brussels sprouts bits were covered with water, and it all simmered for a couple hours to get the broth started.

Later, a dump truck rumbled down the street scattering treatment pellets, but it didn’t seem to be snowing yet. The weekly 7:00 text about trash and recycling pickup on Monday arrived. At 8:00, the wind was whipping and a coating of snow covered the lawn and driveway, but not the pre-treated street. The trash bag was brought to the bin, and both bins were rolled to the end of the driveway. 

Waste management doesn’t seem to take a lot of holidays, and oddly, it seems we’re having recycling two weeks in a row. But that’s what the text message says, so that’s what I followed. My bins never made it out last week due to being blocked in the driveway by snow and a neighbor's car that I invited to park off the street during the ban, so it's all good tonight.

CSB received their
 latest McD's order.

In other text message news, the mysterious CSB of house #208 in some unknown city ordered Door Dash delivery from McDonald’s. Again. And I know this because somehow my phone number is attached to their account and I receive all the updates. "Hi CSB! Your order from McDonald's will be delivered at 5:15 pm." The order has been picked up. The Dasher is approaching. The order was delivered. These are routinely followed by photographic proof of the delivered order on the doorstep. The photo shows a camera, so at least they know when their delivery arrived, because they sure aren’t receiving the text messages. 

A couple weeks ago for a later in the night delivery, the driver even called “CSB” to ask where the delivery should be left and I got to explain that I’m not CSB and this isn’t the phone number for CSB. The driver then had someone else call back to confirm that I am not CSB. 

Several months ago, after too many Door Dash updates for CSB, I even opened my own Door Dash account. It seemed to be the only way to contact customer assistance about the issue, but it went nowhere and the texts to my number continue. Lucky me. I feel like an unwitting spy, and also wonder why CSB only gets McDonald's. 

random thoughts – Day 1,397 – (Saturday) – oil change

On Thursday, the same dashboard with the vacillating range to empty guidance also flashed the yellow genie lamp and the words “oil change needed.” It was so quick I nearly missed it, but the timing was correct, and the vehicle was, indeed, due for an oil change.

Later in the day, I decided to schedule an oil change with the dealership through their website. I like setting appointments online because then I don’t have to call and speak to anyone. It showed nothing available until March. I caved and called. Someone answered immediately and offered several times slots including Friday at 2:00, and a couple on Saturday, which were definitely better than March. While hanging up, I wondered if they knew the online appointment setter is broken. Maybe they deliberately turned it off.

It was raining lightly during the drive across town. I had a book to read in the waiting room and my phone, so the entertainment options were lined up.

The waiting room was quiet with a couple people staring at their phones. I visited the mini-fridge for a mini bottle of water, and grabbed a granola bar from the snack table. The TV in the waiting room played a sales-pitch show about kitchen ware, which was followed by a weight loss program pitch with Marie Osmond. The remote was on the snack table, but it was too far away to reach.  I didn’t care enough to change the channel, but if I’d known I would be there for an hour and a half, my opinion would have been different.

The surprise of the visit was being invited into the service bay so the service tech could show me something. It was a rusty part under the car that he said was the oil pan and should be replaced, ideally today while the oil was already all removed. Ok. Then he said the price. It would be $700. Seven hundred dollars. 

I gulped and may have blanched a few shades paler that usual. Then I snapped to my senses and asked if the current situation would last until the next oil change. The tech said yes, and told me to keep an eye on my driveway for oil spots. Ok, I can do that. And maybe I’ll start looking for a second job so I can pay for the oil pan.

As it was, the oil change and a new air filter cost $96 which was more than I expected. And they didn’t even vacuum the car like the quick change places used to do back in the olden days. Dang, I miss that car vacuuming perk. 

Back at home, I played keyboard warrior and searched on oil pans for my model vehicle. The part seems to be listed all over the place at prices from $37 and up. The mopar site lists it at $114, so $700 feels like a lot of labor charges. 

random thoughts – Day 1,396 – (Friday) – blue skies and tots

Under a blue sky with bright sunshine, we had another outdoor photo shoot for work. It was a chilly and gorgeous winter day with crisp air. The photo subjects were tortured by the sun in their eyes, but they did a good job.

Blue sky and reflecttions.

Back downtown, it was all sunshine and glossy reflections outside, but it wasn't exactly all sunshine and rainbows inside. It was hopping busy at my desk. There was a lot of stress over finishing next week’s photo schedule which had five appointments confirmed and requires most of the week on location, and one shoot that wasn’t yet scheduled with a deadline looming. On top of that, there were several unrelated brush fires and a few rounds of 20 questions on a couple projects.

By 4:00, my head was pounding and my forehead felt like it would split wide open like a walnut shell in a nutcracker. My jaw was tense and I realized I was chewing the insides of my cheeks. There may have been some cussing and sputtering. Ok, there definitely was some of that. 

It was a relief to log out of the system and close the book on the day and week. Thank goodness for the long weekend and the chance to shake it all off. 

Sticks and tots.

At home, it seemed that comfort food was in order, and it was found deep in the freezer. Fish sticks and Tater Tots went into the oven. Mayonnaise and relish were mixed for tartar sauce. It was crispy, golden, deliciousness dipped in creamy goodness. 

It wasn’t a total cure, but it went a long way to relieving the throbbing head and pulsating eyeballs. It will be good to rest my head tonight, and dang, I'm beat.

The weather overnight is predicted to deliver … wait for it … more rain. It rained all summer. It rained all fall. It poured before Christmas and caused flooding. The big snowstorm last weekend was followed by more rain and a warm day that made most of the snow disappear. And now, a couple days after the last episode of wind and rain, it’s more wind and rain.

The water is really getting to me, but it also makes me appreciate the patches of sunshine. There is also a new appreciation for droughts.

random thoughts – Day 1,395 – (Thursday) – winning

Today’s work escapades included a trip to Lawrence. The dashboard informed me via the gas gauge that the car had around a quarter-tank of fuel with “43 RTE” (range to empty, not short for "route"), and I fully intended to fix the problem on the way out of town.

One route of my neighborhood takes me past three gas stations, so it’s not like I’m in some remote area. The first station (Shell) is always dramatically more expensive than the others. Further down the street is a station on the left, which was empty, but I didn’t feel like dealing with a left-hand turn to get in there. The next station is tiny, sometimes has the lowest price of the three, and was jammed with vehicles. So, I kept driving.

The fuel indicator changed from 43 RTE to 55 RTE, and the trip was 15 miles each way, so I chose to stop worrying about it. 

Parking lot snow, Lawrence, MA.

At the destination, there was a big snow pile in the parking lot. It sort of looked like a deflated cloud fallen to the asphalt or some sort of mashed potato version of a soft sculpture of a baked potato I once saw in a museum as a kid and I wanted to play on it. Unfortunately, it was a work day and a work function and there was no time for stomping on a snow pile. Not that I would be able to explain in a rational manner, anyway.

On the way back to Lowell, the dashboard suddenly showed “LOW RTE on Rte. 495. Yikes. How did we go from 43 to 55 to LOW RTE on a 15-mile trip? I don’t know what “low” means in terms of actual distance, but it felt like an adventure in the making. Would I make it all the way to Lowell? Is running out of gas on Route 495 something to call AAA for?

The worry was for naught. I made it to Lowell and the gas station. After filling the tank, I pushed “yes” in response to “Do you want a receipt?” Yes. Yes, I want a receipt. The machine emitted noises like it was printing a receipt. There was no receipt. I hate that. Don’t ask me if I want a receipt and not deliver one. This is right up there with “See clerk for receipt.” If I wanted to go inside, I wouldn’t be paying at the pump and avoiding human contact.

The project was a success. The journey was a success. And I didn’t run out of gas. Win. Win. Win.

random thoughts – Day 1,394 – (Wednesday) – changing conditions

Creepy condensation.

The snow changed to rain overnight and the temperature got warmer, exactly as predicted. As I lay in bed, panicking with thoughts of a wet basement, snow slid off the roof loudly. It’s a sound I don’t remember hearing since living in an old Victorian with a slate roof. The road looked icy with water on top of the remnants of snow.  

In the morning, the porch door and the windows were all fogged over with condensation. It was a mix of cool and horror movie scene creepy. The rain continued to fall and danced on the collected puddles in the driveway and the street. 

I held my breath while descending the stairs for a quick check of the basement. There was some water, but it wasn’t too bad. Of course, after the last big rain just a couple weeks ago, it took two days after the rain before the basement took on water like the Titanic.

Morning light.

By the time I got downtown, the clouds were parting to reveal patches of blue. In one block of Merrimack, the windows on the buildings reflected the buildings across the street. Further down on Merrimack, sun shone upon St. Anne's Church and a bit further it illuminated City Hall against a backdrop of gray. 

Work started with a variety of bagels and cream cheese spreads and coffee bought with our breakfast voucher from participating in the holiday decorating contest at work. It was definitely worth the decorating task. It provided fuel for a day with a few too many potholes and speed bumps. 

There was a benefit to the aggravation. I had to get away from my desk and took a quick walk. The balmy morning had shifted to a more seasonable afternoon with chilly wind, but the change of scenery and the moving air cleared my head. Or gave me a refill. 

After work, the basement was miraculously drier than when I left. Huge relief. I’ll take it.

random thoughts – Day 1,393 – (Tuesday) – pink day

Pretty in pink.

While pouring coffee this morning, freshly showered and dressed for the day, the sky behind the snowy trees was glowing a pretty pinkish gold. As lovely as it was, the “red sky at morning, shepherds take warning” was dancing in my brain, probably because I heard the weather report for rain and wind and potential power outages for the night. Ugh. Or maybe it's always pink and I just haven't caught it at the right moment. 

The bedroom window icicles were longer than ever. That can’t be good. I lowered the top window and smacked the icicles with a hanger. I don’t know if it helped, because the bigger issue is the ice and snow over the window that the icicles were growing from, but it felt satisfying slamming them and then hearing them shatter on the ground below.

The workday felt heavy on nonsense, but it couldn’t have been too awful, because by 7:00 I couldn’t remember any of the specifics. Or maybe I blocked it out. 

Fat snowflakes were falling enthusiastically when a board meeting via Zoom ended. The looked fluffy and innocent, but the snow is expected to change to quite a lot of rain. There have been messages from National Grid about their preparations and tip for consumers. The weather app shows a temperature of 34 degrees and climbing, due to be 50 degrees by 9:00 Wednesday morning. What the heck? This is some really crazy stuff. 

The best I can do is hope the rain that passes through is not as bad as the forecast, and control the things I can. The output hose for the sump pump was dug out. The path to the street and eventually the storm drain is as clear as it can be at the moment. The broom is ready in the basement in case it’s needed for pushing water to the pump. The cell phone will be charged before bed and the LED lantern will come upstairs to the bedroom. Until then – it’s herbal tea and Millionaire Matchmaker on Netflix.