“Remoted – Hybrid” – Day 756 (Monday) – monkey brain

It was another early start to the day. Well, it was mostly the same time as a work day, so it was vacation day early after waking up at 2:30 am to let Winston outside, then tossing and turning and supreme efforts to attempt to calm a monkey brain that suddenly kicked into pre-dawn hyperdrive. For two hours, my brain chose to revisit every injury and aggravation, real and imagined, for the past 15 or 30 years. 

There was a spontaneous and detailed rundown of personal possessions a former boyfriend liberated me of during our cohabitation, including photo albums of my childhood; my junior high, high school, and college yearbooks; and hand-lettered family documents carried from Finland in the 1890s. Mental inventories of art and craft supplies in the spare room were conducted: the gemstone bead chips and sterling silver components waiting to be turned into something; the completed jewelry housed in a tub next to the other tub crammed with hand dyed garments; stacks of photos and boxes of framing parts. There was a listing of the various colored glass panels and bevels housed in the downstairs coat closet with the glass grinder.  

Images of the fun career projects and the creative circle and social life enjoyed in Tennessee danced through the cranium like images on a vacation souvenir viewfinder disc. Click. Me out with friends. Click. Me attending numerous events. Click. Me reading my work at writers nights. Click. Me on a roller derby team and in the best physical shape of my adult life. Click.

Recent and current stress and work projects popped in for cameo appearances. The mental gymnastics occupied two hours that would have been better spent sleeping and it was exhausting.

After 4:30 there was a nap until 6:00 that featured a screening of a remake of a recurring dream. It was the general theme about travel and packing suitcases and not being able find the correct hotel room and being on the verge of missing the transportation home because in this morning’s version, there were ants and winged things and cockroaches crawling in my suitcase and in the bed in the hotel room. It was a relief to wake up after that.

After hauling the trash and recycle bins to the curb, chugging coffee, and setting Winston up in pee pants for my departure, it was off to the annual appointment at the dermatologist. There was time to relax a bit and read a chapter of my book for book club while in the waiting room.

As a personal reward for being awake and at the dermatologist at 8:30 on a Monday morning, there was a trip to Whole Foods across the street afterward. It was peaceful, serene, and not crowded. There was no shopping list, resulting in aimless wandering in the aisles collecting things like whole bay leaf, herring in wine sauce, and the item that required help to locate – tomato puree. I had never heard of tomato puree until reading the recipe for Finnish Hot Dog Sauce (Nakkikastike), allegedly a Finnish childhood comfort food.

It’s a good thing I asked, because tomato puree is not the same thing as tomato paste. Big thanks to the two Whole Foods team members in the canned tomato row who were well versed in all things canned tomato, explained the difference, and found the right item. Someday, the ketchup, tomato puree, mustard, onion, and cream concoction will be fabricated and I’ll see how comforting it really is.

In addition to the soothing environment, the express lane sign was impressively grammatically correct with the sign indicating “12 items or fewer.”

Back at home, it was snuggles with Winston, laundry, front yard poop pickup, and all the other glamorous tasks that are usually done on Sunday. And of course, Gilmore Girls. A magnetic phone mount and a case were ordered from Amazon for the new phone, and the Verizon account was finally unlocked after a third call to customer service. Items were crossed from the list. It was a productive day. Hopefully, the monkey brain is exhausted from it all and it will be a quiet night of sleep.