“Remoted – Hybrid” – Day 816 (Friday) – paper chase

 The medical crap continues. Or more accurately, has begun.

The knee x-rays taken on Wednesday require a consultation with an orthopedic specialist to check out the arthritis and the comical sounding “water on the knee.” All good, except it was the unfortunate hour of nearly 4:00 on a Friday when I finally thought about this, because the knee felt mostly fine today. Plus, my grand plan for the day was to finally relax at home, which was reinforced by dressing in sweat pants and an oversized, paint-stained sweatshirt not really suitable for public consumption. Relaxing and doing a lot of nothing was the initial plan for most of the week before I ended up being busy nearly every day.

The orthopedic office took my name and basic insurance info, then asked if there had been any previous surgeries. When the answer was “yes,” I was told to have the hospital where the surgery took place fax the “op notes” to their office before an appointment could be made. It was asked what “op notes” are, because if I am relaying messages between medical offices, I want to know what the heck I’m asking for. My languages are limited to America English, sarcasm, small amounts of French and Finnish, and some marketing jargon. And phone calls are about my least favorite activity and usually require preparation and rehearsal.  

The quest was accepted, because if not, there will be no appointment, no pain relief, and the likelihood it all gets worse. Three folders of medical and insurance crap were rifled through in search of the name of the surgeon who fixed my broken leg in 2011, thinking it might be needed. An online search for a phone number for the hospital where the surgery was done revealed it changed names in 2016 when it became part of another healthcare system.

The Tennessee hospital number was dialed and eventually a human was reached. The bad news is, they require the request from the medical office be sent to them directly via fax. The game begins. And now I have the answer to the question we've often asked at work, "who the heck still uses a fax?"

The orthopedic office was called again to relay the info that they need to make the request and where to fax it. There was a period of incarceration in the menu system and several minutes of listening to biographies of each person in the office before giving up and hanging up. 

Then, the idea struck to call the orthopedic surgeon’s office in Tennessee to see if they could send the report on my direction or if they needed the medical office to request it. Listings were found for offices for the surgeon in both Tennessee and Texas. The number for the Tennessee office reached a recording that the number is disconnected. Another number was found and a human informed me I need to call the Share Care office for records requests.

The fourth phone call for the singular fax quest was placed. The Share Care office is in East Tennessee, and the central time zone clock was no longer in my favor. A recording informed it was “after normal business hours.” 

Good times. And by “good times,” I of course mean “total pain in the ass times,” because who doesn’t love making phone calls and sitting on hold forever. And I get to do it again next week, unless I can find a way to fax the Tennessee hospital fax number to the Massachusetts orthopedic office with the instructions that they need to fax their request for the report. New quest? Hmmm.