“Remoted” – Day 436 (Wednesday)

The most egregious of errors has occurred at The BungaLowell. The horror is nearly unspeakable.

There are no snacks. No cookies, no saltine or Ritz crackers upon which to put peanut butter, no candies, no chips. None of these.  Not even a granola bar. The dogs are better stocked with tasty bits than the human of the household.

Oddly, the other day in Family Dollar, the snacks were dismissed. I wasn’t hungry at the time, and was therefore uninterested in looking at any of them. I thought I may regret the choice, but rolled the dice and skipped the snacks, resulting in the current snack dry spell.

Yum, cardboard!

The regret is now hitting. Hard. Heirloom cherry tomatoes are very sweet, but those will not fool me into thinking I’m having a snack. While good, they are not chocolatey or salty or crunchy. This has forced me into the unfortunate position of eating Rye Crisp. 

It’s not that I don’t like Rye Crisp, it’s just that the cardboard color and dry texture make it seem like more of an emergency ration for a natural disaster or zombie apocalypse. Or maybe a substitute for cedar shingles on a Cape Cod house renovation. It’s far from my top snacking choice. Generally, if it were chosen in desperation for a snack, it would have a schmear of soft butter, but the butter is currently in the refrigerator and cold and solid. the package shows it with a slice of cold cut meat, tomato and lettuce, but supper was a tomato, cheese, and lettuce sandwich, so the serving suggestion is not appealing.

The produce box came today, and unfortunately, everything fun was deleted and only basic vegetables and a few fruits kept in the order. An eggplant or a zucchini, while good for a supper stir fry, are hardly a snack. Two mandarin oranges have already been eaten. When carrots are part of most meals, it’s difficult to view them as a treat and not a basic ingredient. So, it’s dry, cardboard-like Rye Crisp for a pseudo snack. Four have already been consumed, and we are now creeping into candy bar calorie territory, but without the satisfaction.

The dogs are loving the cardboard treat, probably because it has the texture I imagine a dry dog biscuit to have. They have been staring at me, transfixed, while I choke down the shingles. The snack situation is going to need a remedy. Soon, Just not right now, it's pouring outside.