“Remoted” – Workday Twenty-Five (Friday)

Today was a day of waiting and wanting. I’m not sure I’ve ever wanted a FedEx truck in my driveway as much as today. Almost every day, at different points in the day, a FedEx truck and a UPS truck each back into my driveway to turn around, which triggers an alert from my door security camera to my phone. These trucks are part of a stream of roughly 25 cars each day pulling in to turn around and trigger alerts, and yes, I sometimes get all Clint Eastwood “get off my lawn” aggravated.

Anyway, today I WANTED a FedEx truck in the driveway – specifically, I wanted the FedEx truck with my wine delivery in the driveway. Every one of the too many times that the dogs barked today, I was convinced it was the wine ordered last Friday. The only reason I opened and then finished my one bottle of wine last weekend was because six more were due this week. When it was ordered on Friday the 10^th, the delivery was noted as Tuesday the 14^th, which felt impressively fast. There was also a note on the site’s home page about heavy volume and possible delays which felt both realistic and reasonable, and if history is an indicator, there wouldn’t be a bottle opened before Friday anyway. 

Yay!

On Thursday the 16^th, there was an email from the winery stating the wine had shipped and still, amusingly, showed a delivery date of Tuesday the 14^th. Is Doctor Who in charge of this wine distribution and is it being delivered in the TARDIS? Because that would be the most impressive wine delivery in the galaxy, and I would sign for that program up for life. 

Huh?

The FedEx tracker showed a delivery of Friday, April 17^th “by end of day” which provided something to look forward to. There was also a button for more specific tracking, which revealed very little. It showed that a shipping label was created on Thursday in Cobleskill, NY, and that was about it. The text alert was even more cryptic – it said estimated delivery was not available, adult signature - identification is required, and if I’m not going to be home, to let them know. Huh? 

At 6:00, which was the end of my workday, and had earlier boldly been deemed wine o’clock when there was no wine in the house, I checked the FedEx tracker. It still said Friday, April 17^th “by end of day.” Ummmm, tick, tock, tick, tock. Where does FedEx's “end of day” sit on my clock?

Over the next couple hours, while sitting on the couch with my adult identification nearby,  half watching “Married at First Sight” (Charlotte), wine was occupying a lot of space in my head. Most days, wine is not even a thought. Bottles have sat untouched for months, even a year, but today, there was a yearning for a glass of wine in a way like never before. There was reluctance to open one of the precious few remaining bottles of beer (which have lazed in the fridge since a Christmas Eve party),or fix a mixed drink, so convinced was I that the truck would arrive immediately after doing so, in the same way that the person you’re waiting for finally shows up when you visit the toilet.

Over and over the tracker was checked. Over and over it said, “Friday, by end of day.” Finally, at 8:00 there was a cryptic update on the site that said the “estimated delivery date is pending.” What, what? The passage of time delivered negative progress, but no wine. Finally, at 8:37, there was a text update that “delivery is rescheduled for Saturday the 18^th.” Sigh. I hope the “rain turning to snow with slippery road conditions” forecast for Saturday does not further hinder delivery. Thank you FedEx for turning my wine into ice water tonight. It’s probably just as well – I volunteered to work tomorrow.