random thoughts – Day 2,054 (Friday) – time, pump, dip

It is amazing to me how fast time is passing by in joblessness. Why can’t it pass as slowly as the working days did? Seriously. Why? It’s already Friday but it feels like it should just be this past Tuesday. Workweeks never, ever passed this quickly and I feel cheated.

This week marks the 18th week since being laid off. The job of applying for jobs has been underway with at least three applications submitted each week and most seem to go into a void. Then the exact same job description (literally word for word) appears a week later with a different placement agency name. How many of the posted jobs even exist? Some systems at least have the decency to provide an autoresponder message acknowledging receipt of the application, which is helpful. Some even provide a politely worded rejection letter, with often the same language no matter where it came from (probably a cookie cutter AI letter). At least it provides closure.

The tire inflator acquisition has been completed. After being presented with the overwhelming number of options on the big A to Z site, I wised up and decided to look in local retailers. The NAPA auto parts store nearby isn’t opened yet, but Aubuchon Hardware in the same shopping plaza had a few models priced from around $60 to about $120. 

Tire pump, finally bought.

Walmart had more options including lower price points and a $32 model with a digital readout was bought. It's two minutes faster from 0 psi to 35 psi than the $27 non-digital gauge version. I doubt I’d be filling from totally flat. Usually, the problem tire is at 28 and the others are at 32 or 33 after the temperature drops. The pump can also work on balls and inflatables, so maybe I’ll finally fill the yoga fitness ball (and then worry about where to keep the thing). The best part will be not worrying about having quarters handy for the gas station air pumps which aren’t always easy to find.

Delicious!!

The most gratifying purchase at Walmart wasn’t even the tire pump. It was in the produce department and was an afterthought along the lines of “I wonder if they have [insert current grocery Holy Grail item name here]”. The delectable cranberry jalapeno dip discovered at Costco two years ago in Vegas during the niece's wedding week is seasonal, and oddly, Costco around here hasn’t ever had it. Market Basket sometimes has a cherry jalapeno dip, and today, Walmart had the cranberry jalapeno dip. Once found, I had to backtrack through the massive store to get to the cracker row for something to eat it with. 

Half a sleeve of the store brand version of Ritz crackers was the conveyance vehicle for the dip and it was deemed supper. And a fine supper it was. Now I’m imagining it as a spread on a chicken sandwich on fresh multigrain bread (I have neither of these ingredients). If I thought it would freeze well, I’d buy the entire inventory. I guess I have something fun to research in the next couple days.

random thoughts – Day 2,053 (Thursday) – dodged a bullet

In September, I had a couple home renovation companies at the house to provide estimates for a new roof and possibly siding. The rep from the first company came mid-month and began the “presentation” with a lot of talking about himself and slamming larger companies with advertising budgets. After three hours, figures finally emerged. The roof estimate was $20,000, but I could save $995 dollars if I committed right then and definitely before the weekend was out and before the regular sales guy came back from vacation. It felt shady and I did not commit. The rep and his incessant droning about himself, the price tag, and the pressure tactic had really turned me off.

The second estimate, later in the month, was from a local family-owned and operated company that has been around since 1945 and has a big enough marketing budget to do a lot of advertising. Based on the advertising and overhead comments of the first estimator, I expected the second one to be higher. A team of two company representatives arrived and after measuring and examining the current roof and siding, busted out the laptop and samples and began the sales speech.

The sales presentation opened with the younger, wide-eyed whippersnapper relaying the origin story of the company and its decades of family ownership and how they would be around for all time. Like forever forever. I was feeling a little salty that day and interrupted the shiny idealist to suggest he not be too heavily invested in that particular flavor of Kool-Aid because promises and marketing pitches sound great but aren’t forever. I relayed the still fresh and painful tale of my nine years preaching a similar promise for an employer that changed things up one day and put 125 of us out of work.

After the “this company will be here forever” speechifying, we proceeded with the materials samples, work process, and costs. As predicted, the estimate was higher. The roof estimate was $36,000 and for roof and siding it was $112,000. Because neither of these were urgent and I was still in the information gathering stage, I was not willing to commit to the work for the “good today only” discount.

Fast forward five weeks. The first local news story I saw this morning was about the second company and its sudden closure this week. News accounts note the company has been owned by a private equity firm since 2022.  

Sometimes my procrastination pays off, in this case, to the tune of tens of thousands of dollars. I wonder about the sales guy with the recent home purchase, wife, and young child, and how he and his family are doing. At least we had months of advance notice at my former employer. It sounds like the renovation company closure came out of the blue and blindsided the employees and customers. I’m thankful I dodged that bullet and wasn’t one of those customers. 

random thoughts – Day 2,052 (Wednesday) – sleep and shop

It was lovely sleeping weather and after hitting “stop” on the cell phone alarm at 6:30, I slept solidly until 8:15. I considered staying in bed longer but guilted myself out of bed instead. For the past few years, the only times I've stayed in bed all morning were because I was sick. Maybe someday I'll lounge in bed until noon simply because I can. 

It was a quiet morning but in the afternoon I called Mom to ask if she was interested in a trip to Ocean State Job Lot. I wanted diced tomatoes and nail polish remover. Mom wanted cushions for her wood dining chairs.

The polish remover was located and a bottle of polish in an aqua color I don’t have in the many bottles in the bathroom closet. My regular stops in the store usually include bath linens and dishes. There were no big bath towels in colors that work for my house and no soup bowls in the style I like. There were also no long sleeve sleep tee shirts which are a lighter weight fabric than regular tee shirts. For the first time in ages, the grocery section was a disappointment with shelves less full than usual and no canned vegetables to be found.

Crow in the yard.

The afternoon included standing at the window and photo stalking a crow in the front yard. Since the turkey meetup of several days ago, the yard has been quiet except for the squirrel trade route. Seeing a couple crows on the lawn again was almost exciting.

After a lackluster supper of microwaved previously frozen rice, beans, and salsa, a trip to Aldi was considered. It would have required putting on shoes and a coat and spending more money and the idea was quickly dismissed. The mission would have been one or two items, but it almost never works out that way at Aldi and the cover charge usually works out to be about $50.

random thoughts – Day 2,051 (Tuesday) – x-ray vision

The morning was rough with the right shoulder feeling like it had been through a battle while I slept. Thank goodness for a gel ice pack wrapped in a towel and shoved under the shoulder of my bathrobe. Later thanks go to heating pads. Eternal thanks go to swearing, which releases stress momentarily, if nothing else. 

After the first round of icing the shoulder area pain was relieved and it was back to the tingling arm, hand, and fingers, which were all extra spicy today. The right index finger had bonus content with pain and feeling swollen.

After a coffee visit with Mom it was back to my house. The handyman was scheduled to return to install the ceiling fan and light in the main bathroom and the new downspout on the carport. We started drafting the cold weather work list of non-urgent tasks that first require me shopping for a dining room light and a medicine cabinet.

Around noon, the handyman left and there was the first food of the day (leftover Chinese food, continued). A call was made to the backup hospital radiology department in another city to confirm they had received the x-ray order from the spine and pain center that was supposed to be sent yesterday. They had not received it and based on the past several weeks I was not the tiniest bit surprised. Before I sent a portal note to the spine center team about the referral, I called the local hospital radiology department to see if they were taking walk-in x-rays yet. The person on the phone said they were taking x-rays as long as there was an “order in hand.” My order was in their computer and I was assured this was good.

I grabbed a jacket and was out the door and on the road within five minutes of ending the second call. At the hospital, I followed the signs through the maze of a building to patient registration as I had been instructed on the phone. The person behind the glass told me (very politely) that non-emergency x-rays were still not being taken and I relayed the info received from the phone call of less than 20 minutes earlier.

The receptionist expressed dismay with colleagues who have been providing incorrect info, then checked in with someone in an office down the hall. She returned with a small stack of paperwork and took me to an office where she told the occupant to make sure my papers were marked with “approved.” After a few signatures on a digital pad I was told to report to the CT scan department.

Ice pack and TV,
evening edition.

It was a short wait before I was brought into a room for three neck x-ray views. There seemed to be an expert teaching a trainee and I got to hear the physical placement and alignment of  three views and an explanation of what else would have been done if my visit had been the result of an auto accident. Then I was on my way back home, where supper was (drum roll) … Chinese food (the final chapter). Tomorrow, it will be back to the life of having to think about what to eat again. 

Also tomorrow, hopefully there will be news from the spine and pain center with some steps for pain relief. I would like to be done with things hurting and tingling and not being able to get comfortable and feeling perpetually bitchy because things hurt. It’s exhausting. There are things to be done besides sitting with ice packs and heating pads and I’d like to be doing some of them.

random thoughts – Day 2,050 (Monday) – stress, nostalgia, progress

The frustrations are mounting. An issue has arisen with my unemployment payments from the merger/layoff which has heaped on a fresh shit ton of stress. The morning was spent in rounds of phone tag with someone from an office there which provided information and little comfort. A nervous breakdown felt imminent by the time I got off the phone.

The calendar shows a full month of constant shoulder/neck issues. Each hellacious morning begins with feeling like a broken puppet and sitting quietly with an ice pack. The ice pack helps with the neck pain (and we continue our dalliance all day long), but the tingling from shoulder to fingertips is constant, varying in intensity but never actually stopping.

The month of pain has not been idle. There have been messages to the primary care physician, a visit to an orthopedic who ruled it isn’t a shoulder issue, a visit with the spine and pain center which was delayed by a cybersecurity event at the local hospital that has lasted two weeks (so far) and crippled communications and the ability to have an x-ray done there (among other things).

Today, the hospital phones were functional and I was able to reach the radiology department. Hospital communications may be more normal, but they said they still can’t do x-rays and suggested I ask for a referral to a hospital in another town. The x-ray referral will now be sent to a hospital 20 miles away.

Moose and me on the mend.

It's neck issues now, but fourteen years ago on this date, I was laid up with a broken leg. A derby teammate hosted and played nurse and chauffer while Moose and I crashed at her house. I was in a walking boot, undergoing home physical therapy, and trying to not be in the way too much, which was hard when I occupied the entire couch with my leg elevated. Moose stuck by my side while I recuperated there and then later, back at my house. I miss Moose (and Winston) every day. 

The handyman was at the house today to begin work on the top items from the home inspector’s report. The carport gutter was cleaned out and the hole in the roof panel that once housed a sapling is repaired. A new downspout will be installed tomorrow. The crawlspace has new access doors that won’t rot. One of the bathroom fans is replaced, the other will be done tomorrow.

Oversized hood.

Other items on the original list are under review. The desire for a new stove hood is tabled. The current hood is much wider than the stove (40-inches on a 30-inch stove) and it’s low, making it hard to ladle soup or sauce out of the kettle without crashing a hand into the hood. I have no idea why it's like this, but I'll bet someone who never cooked a pot of soup or sauce (or anything else) had something to do with it. 

A smaller, correctly-sized hood can be installed but it will leave five-inch gaps on each side that will need to be dealt with. In order to create more space between the range top and the fan, the new one would need to be installed inside the cabinet, eliminating several inches of storage space and making a shelf too high to reach, rendering it useless. The cost/benefit analysis isn’t looking favorable. 

While the bathroom fan was being installed, I sat on the couch with a heating pad on my back and watched a Netflix show about an Italian serial murderer (The Monster of Florence - A True Story). When the handyman left, I heated and consumed an insane amount of leftover Chinese food for lunch. Shortly after eating, I crashed on the couch and napped for an hour and a half. 

And there we have it. A day of stress, pain, nostalgia, progress, and rest. Lather, rinse, repeat.

random thoughts – Day 2,049 (Sunday) – stuff and air compressors

It was a slow start to the morning compounded by forgetting we were invited to wear Halloween costumes to dance class today. This had me racing around looking for something that didn’t require much effort and that I could shed quickly after class and change into civilian clothes. The solution was a 1960s style psychedelic colored/patterned dress bought in a Boston thrift store decades ago with lime green fishnet tights and a black sequin newsboy cap. Once upon a time I wore it to nightclubs. Now it hangs in a closet, pulled out for the first time in a decade for a Sunday morning dance practice. After class it was generic jeans and a wool sweater.

The next eight hours of the day were, depending upon how you view it, either mostly wasted or delightfully leisurely. Meaning, I did very little. Bare basics were handled and I fed myself. The bed was stripped, sheets laundered, and the bed remade. I watched Pernille, a Norwegian dramedy on Netflix. I listened to an Egyptian song by the artist Hakim for a potential choreography and decided that now I don’t like it as much as when I heard it in a belly dance documentary during the week.

Time was spent looking at portable air compressor pumps online because the temperature dropped and the car tires are low again. It was a nice run of a few weeks since the last airing up and I’m 100% over chasing down quarters and gas station air pumps. Thus the appeal of my very own wonderous and amazing tire inflator thingy.

So many confusing options.

The challenge with buying a portable tire pump thingy is that there are a million of them out there at a range of price points from the low “do I trust this $25 item” to the high “is this $129 one really better?”. The product descriptions read like a foreign language. Beyond getting from Point A to Point B, gas prices, and radio stations, I have minimal interest in vehicle related stuff and despise the fact that I even have to be searching for this crap. Errrrr.

random thoughts – Day 2,048 (Saturday) - fun and food

It was the best of days. It began with costume planning, dance refinement, and conversation with my duet partner. We tightened up some bits in the dance and decided what we will wear on performance day. We chatted and traded stories and several hours flew by in a blink.

Skip Bo underway.

Later, it was family game time at Mom’s. My sister, three nieces, nephew-in-law, Mom, and I sat around a big folding table and played Skip-Bo. I haven’t played it in many years and needed the refresher course. The conversation was fun and lively. There was the tale of the eldest niece and her husband’s recent overnight trip to northern Maine and stay in a scary rental cottage. There were tales of camping (mis)adventures, usually involving bad weather (including unexpected snow). Stories of youthful temper tantrums seem to suggest our specific ways of acting out might be hereditary and also that we exhibit amazing physical strength when pi**ed at siblings. 

Supper was a delivery order of a ridiculous amount of Chinese food from the restaurant the couch delivery team recommended a month or two ago. Their recommendation was solid and it was much better than the other restaurant I got delivery from before. And I’ll be eating pad thai, crab rangoon, and a pu pu platter for at least the next three days. This was the plan. 

random thoughts – Day 2,047 (Friday) – animal life and brownies

Turkey parade.

Another set of weekdays is done, and another weekend looms with an intoxicating mix of leisure time and specific plans that will spare me feeling like a total slug. Today was yet another sluggish day. There was the now customary shoulder and arm pain care, job applications, and loose ideas for leaving the house. And brownies were baked.

There were fantasies about setting up the stained glass work area, but they were abandoned. By the time I get to it, most of the kinks will have been worked out mentally and it should be relatively easy to execute. My physical laziness is almost always accompanied by busy brain activity.

New curtains.

The reasons to leave the house all involved shopping, but the list of needed items is only one deep and my world wasn’t going to disintegrate if I failed to buy diced tomatoes today. There was a can in the pantry from a recent trip to Hannaford, but when I took it out to open it to add to a soup yesterday, the top ring of the can was rusted and looked messed up. Spoilage seemed likely. 

Instead of visiting a grocery store, the day was spent admiring the new navy blue sheers that were hung in the dining room on Thursday. The space finally looks like some thought was invested in it. The walls still need artwork, which is the story throughout the house, but I’m not in that headspace yet. It will get there. I'm still waiting for the walls to talk to me.

Kiki on the bed.

There was excitement with a turkey parade. It started with the gang of four bearded birds coming through the front yard and Mom calling to alert me to the arrival of company. The first cluster was quickly followed by two females which morphed into a cluster of seven birds which included the one with the limp. During the crossing from my side of the street to the other side, three vehicles passed by and nearly took out some of the birds. Come on people, pay attention to the speed limit and the neighborhood wildlife.

On the domesticated animal front, Kiki spent most of the day lounging atop the bed like the beautiful royalty she is. The best part is that she let me lay next to her and stroke her face and give her shoulder rubs multiple times throughout the day. And the big surprise bonus – she licked my fingers. The first time I thought it was an accident, but then she did it again, intentionally. My heart exploded.

Brownies.

The brownies, a snap decision, were a bit of a disappointment. Chili powder was added in an attempt to recreate the delicious chili hot cocoa and chocolate bars I love. The result that emerged form the oven was unfortunately lackluster. There was an undercurrent of a taste of something, but there was no distinct chili flavor. It didn't stop me from eating a significant chunk of it. 

The chili brownie experiment will require more work to refine the flavor profile. Maybe the answer is cayenne. Or maybe it's as simple as a recipe search because I truly doubt I am the first to try this.

random thoughts – Day 2,046 (Thursday) – mom’s birthday

At The Old Mill.

It’s Mom’s birthday and the family went out to dinner to celebrate. Nine of us assembled at The Old Mill, a local dining institution. The Old Mill features water, a waterfall, and water fowl, and baskets of corn fritters and pecan rolls upon being seated. After a fritter and a roll I could have skipped the supper part (I didn’t). 

We talked and laughed and ate. We admired the ducks on the way out and remarked on the beautiful green heads and the fact that the menu includes "roast country duck." We wondered if the ducks outside are aware of this.  It was delicious and fun.

In the sliding scale of Mom’s birthday’s, this was high on the satisfaction level. My worst version of Mom’s birthday was in 2011. I was in a hospital bed in Tennessee, medicated after early morning surgery to mend the leg broken the night before in the final roller derby event of Clarksville Roller Derby's inaugural season. 

An assistant came in to change the bedding and after, my phone, which had been in the bed with me, was missing. Panic mode commenced when I reached for the phone to call Mom and tell her “happy birthday” from 1,200 miles away.

Shortly before the break, 10-22-2011.

I deduced the phone was in the recently removed sheets and called for a nurse. In my imagination, the sheets and my phone were in a giant laundry bin with lots of other bedding, en route to a massive basement level laundry room with dozens of machines where all would be washed, and in the case of the phone, ruined. This vision fed the panic and I called the nurse several times more than was necessary because the phone and the sheets were actually in a laundry bin at the foot of my bed.

When I called Mom, the medication had me slurring my words and she didn’t know it was me. I was alone and very far removed from family and it was awful being the odd one out but I was also the one who moved away so it was a situation of my own making. Since moving back home in 2013, it’s been great being part of family birthdays again. And all the other family things, holiday and everyday, planned and spontaneous.

random thoughts - Day 2,045 (Wednesday) - tingling, rain, and sun

Morning rain on
the skylight.

Since the visit to the spine and pain center it's been a waiting game. The aches, pain, and throbbing improved, but the tingling and occasional numbness is worse. Initially, it was from elbow to fingertips, but now it's shoulder to fingertips. There has been waiting to hear from the physical therapy group and worse, waiting to get an x-ray. Normally, I would have gone from the spine center to radiology, but that wasn't possible the day of my appointment due to the system outage. The problem with the phones and other systems continues and I haven't been able to verify I could have an x-ray done with the ongoing issues. 

Today, I was awake unfortunately early. After unsuccessfully attempting sleep, at 4:54 I checked the time, conceded defeat, and got up. There was no point waiting around in bed. It was raining again, and it pinged off the skylights and puddled in the dips in the street.

Coffee was made. BBC News, my current morning obsession, was consumed. I called the radiology center to see if I could get in for an x-ray. And again, it was unsuccessful. The department number had a busy signal before disconnecting. The hospital main number had a message that the voice mailbox for the number dialed has not been set up. I reached out to the spine center via the patient portal and it was confirmed that x-rays are still only being done for urgent situations. It was back to the couch with the ice pack, thankful to have the precious intel before driving across town. I may expire from old age before I get the x-ray. 

Cloudy with sun creeping in.

By 11:15, the clouds were moving on and the sun was edging its way in. The sky looked more interesting and slightly more dramatic than when it was gray ceiling with rain. The weather was improving but the day was dominated by an undercurrent of tiredness and tingling discomfort. 

The new, barefoot saving traffic area heat registers arrived and were installed in the kitchen and laundry room. Yesterday, the price dropped from $17 to $10 each and I pounced. Soup was made. The list for the handyman was written out. Tomorrow we will review the issues and formulate a plan. 

random thoughts - Day 2,044 (Tuesday) - sun and shadow

Morning shadow.

Sunshine hit the front of the house this morning and something in the front yard cast shadows on the shades in the bedroom. I noticed it when I came into the bedroom from the living room and it was a startling jump scare moment but then I realized it was flora and not a peeping Tom. 

It could have been a shadow from the tree. Maybe it was from the hydrangea in front of the house that suddenly turned brown when it got cold and then most of the leaves blew off and now it's a cluster of brown sticks with a few leaves clinging on for dear life. It could be the other unknown bush thing out front. I didn't check, although it would have been easy enough to do so. It wasn't important what cast the shadow and it was more interesting enjoying the shadows on the windows. 

Kiki in a sun spot.

A bit later in the living room, the sun cast a rectangle onto the rug. Kiki found it and neatly placed herself in a loaf in the sun rectangle. She sat in the sun spot for a while (probably so I could admire her marvelousness), a shadow of her herself behind her and then she quietly slipped off to the bedroom. 

Lately, as in the past couple weeks or so, Kiki has been openly napping on the bed, either on the plush blanket folded at the foot of the bed, or nestled against the pillows at the head of the bed. She no longer jumps off and hides when I enter the room and if I'm careful and approach slowly and ease onto the bed, she will let me lay next to her for a minute or two and stroke her coat and tell her what a beautiful kitty she is. Then I slip away, because I don't want to overstay my welcome and annoy her. On my bed. In my room. In my house. 

The proximity progress is exciting and the arm's length mandate seems to have been eased. Kiki now lets me stroke her from her head to the tip of her tail with two hands. There are still rules. I must be seated on the couch and she must be on the floor with a clear escape path and I am not allowed to make any sudden moves or a gesture that could be interpreted as an attempt to pick her up. 

Afternoon
shadowplay.

Much later in the day, around the time the work day would be ending if I was a productive member of society and had a job, the sun was at the back of the house casting shadows on the wall of the lace curtain panels installed yesterday and the lighting fixture installed last week or maybe earlier. Who knows. Time is losing its meaning but it is still flying by. In any event, for the third time in the day, I was entertained by the sunshine and shadow play. 

random thoughts - Day 2,043 (Monday) - rainy day accomplishment

"Maintenance
break."

It rained. It was the first I sound I heard while waking up, and it felt like the sound of staying in the house. There was an uncharacteristic morning turning on of the TV, where I learned the news of the web services outage on BBC News. The Sunday night TV discovery was the channel lineup is different again, not just from Saturday to Sunday, when four versions of HBO were clustered in the lineup (HD, Comedy, Drama, Latin) but again from Sunday to Monday when there were only two HBO flavors. I detest scrolling through the endless screens, but it did land me on BBC News, so that was okay.

The web services thing impacted a few planned activities and I couldn't continue my chess lessons on Duolingo. By the time the app was back from "Maintenance Break," I had lost my chance to use the double points bonuses from Sunday's night owl and the last Friend Quest. Errrr. 

On the adulting front, I was unable to check a couple accounts and set up payments, but I made the phone call (finally) to set up oil delivery. The lady at the oil company was sweet and I learned that the former owner of my house used to send her a handwritten note each fall and she had beautiful penmanship. 

One bookcase set.

Perhaps most importantly, time was spent in the soon to be functional guest room. Two bookcases that had been shoved into the closet on move-in day and jammed with books were emptied and hauled out to the living room for auditions. These are massed produced family pieces from my grandmother and a great aunt that are similar but not exact matches. They are the same ones that every family we knew had when I was a kid. In the course of my custodianship, they have served in main bedrooms, offices, guest rooms, and been stuffed in junk rooms with the door shut.

One bookcase is a couple inches too wide to work on the potential walls in the living/dining space, but the smaller one fit on a narrow wall between the desk and the kitchen doorway. I don't love it there and I hate that the space is becoming full of dark brown furniture. Books were set because they fit and without the usual consideration for grouping by genre or author. Those will be battles for another day. The activity freed up closet space to finally get started in the guest room and a three drawer plastic chest with art supplies was set in there. 

random thoughts - Day 2,042 (Sunday) - pasta alternative

The Friday stop at Ocean State Job Lot yielded the interesting sounding vegetable based, gluten free hearts of palm linguine pasta. The fanciful marketing text on the box for the "pasta" made from "the inner core, or heart, of a palm tree" claims it is "everything you're looking for in a wheat pasta alternative." I wasn't even looking for a wheat pasta alternative, but the idea of "a similar consistency to a regular wheat-based pasta" was captivating. Ok, I'll bite. I like trying new things. 

Tonight, there was an urge to make something, but not anything complicated or that would dirty a lot of dishes. The box of hearts of palm pasta was plucked from the pantry. The cooking instructions are vague. It can be either microwaved with "sauce of your choice" for 60 seconds or until desired temperature, or cooked on the stovetop with an unspecified amount of extra virgin olive oil or "sauce of your choice," for an unspecified length of time "until you reach desired temperature."

Pretend pasta
kitchen test.

After pouring in some olive oil, and then some more olive oil, sliced mushrooms, chopped broccoli, carrot shavings, and black pepper were added because it looked bland. The "noodles" were tested and were still vegetable crunchy. Parmesan was tossed in with a splash of half and half and it cooked a few more minutes. 

The stuff was plated (ok, bowled) and taken to the living room. The noodles were still leaning more towards crunchy than towards al dente. It looked like pasta more than it felt like pasta. It wasn't awful. It's just not great because after the marketing hype (probably written based on hearsay and caffeine-fueled fantasies)  I was expecting a pasta mouth feel. 

The added veggies helped the appearance a lot, and maybe some more experimentation will help get it just right. Meaning -- I need to get back to Ocean State and buy more now before it's all gone. Or remember that I have a spiralizer and run a zucchini through it to make fresh vegetable based pretend noodles.

random thoughts - Day 2,041 (Saturday) - dress-up month

An event in
Worcester (2014).

October is potentially the best month, in terms of dress-up opportunities. Of course, if you are in the group of people who don't like donning costumes for events or dressing up for weddings, then it's probably less fun. Miserable, even. I used to be married to one such person. It made Halloween hard for both of us.

For many years, the costume opportunities were Halloween parties in all manner of settings. During the time with Ex1, we hosted a party at our house most years. Ex1 loved costumes and parties, but Ex2 couldn't have been less interested in costumes or even socializing if he tried. 

During the many not married years, there were parties at the homes of friends and friends of friends and costumed arts organization fundraisers. Now, the main October dress-ups are Halloween event performances with the dance troupe and there are fewer house parties. That's what happens when you get older. 

My costume choices have run the gamut. One year, I was a mermaid in a rented gold costume with a log blond wig and X1 was a lobster at our house party. Another guest arrived as a green mermaid and she looked better than I did, so that was a bummer. Years later, I was a mermaid again in a costume that I made and it went much better for me. 

Apocalypse theme,
Townsend, 10-11-25

Costumes of the past have included Red Riding Hood (several times, both innocent and saucy versions), Bettie Page, a cowboy, Prince (twice), fortune teller (last minute invite, quickest I could pull together), White Witch from Narnia, disco queen, Playboy Bunny, and so many more. 

I kind of miss the Halloween house party circuit life. Hopefully, someone will decide to have a party before I put away all the components dug out for the dance performances the past two weekends. It probably won't be me this year though, the house is still in chaos. 

random thoughts - Day 2,040 (Friday) - shakin' it up

The day had a fun shakeup. Instead of sitting around all morning drinking coffee and goofing off,  I went shopping with a friend. The first plan was to visit a fabric store, which has the potential of turning out similar to unattended toddlers going wild in a toy store. Due to the fact we have no specific current fabric needs and would be deliberately placing ourselves in the face of temptation to just check it out, we shifted gears and went to Old Navy for a specific purpose instead. It was fun. The only thing I bought was a pack of gum at a gas station convenience store, but my friend accomplished her mission. 

Motivation required to shop.

On the way back to my house, I stopped at Ocean State Job Lot because it was a location I hadn't visited. Most of the space in front of the store is a construction zone with diggers and pipes. A piece of plywood with "walkway" in orange spray paint noted the dirt path fenced off around the worksite. It required some motivation to get into the store but I had already made my choice when I parked the car and I was going in. 

Once inside, no cart or hand basket was taken (deliberately). If I could carry it, I could buy it, otherwise, tough luck. It wasn't long before I was at maximum capacity with a bottle of olive oil, large jar of chopped garlic, box of hearts of palm pasta, a greeting card, and two bottles of nail polish. The shopping was done. 

Roadside scenery while in traffic.

There was traffic on Route 2A due to a train stopped across the road. Several cars bailed out of the line to turn back and I had the chance to take a side street and backtrack towards Aldi, but I've been there too much lately and chose to wait it out. There were colored leaves along the roadside and across whatever body of water was to the right. The end of the train was visible through the trees. After about eight minutes, the train resumed its passage through the crossing, the lights stopped flashing, the gates raised up and we were free. 

The afternoon was occupied with revising the Halloween dance costume chosen yesterday after waking up today with "pirate" on the brain. There was a search for the skull and bones bandana, mesh sleeves printed like tattoos, and the stripey shirt. The sleeves were not located and the idea shifted again. It could shift again tomorrow. So far, it's been several hours of mental labor on a costume for a 15 minute performance, but mostly because work expands to fill the time allotted.

We had a rehearsal tonight and it was good. We shimmied, marked placements, checked costumes, and we are set for tomorrow.  It was a nice change to the usual schedule.  On Sunday, we begin work to polish the November 2 showcase performance. My niece arrives tomorrow for a visit, so the next few weeks will have some fun family time.

random thoughts - Day 2,039 (Thursday) - vent, costume, medication

The pill pack was started this morning after an earlier than usual breakfast per the instructions to take with food. There were the usual rounds with the ice pack in the morning. There was a lot of lounging about, accompanied by spacing out mentally, because I could. Words with Friends, Wordle, and social media all received attention. 

The step stool was hauled to the kitchen to check the space above the cabinets for placing small artworks. The artworks were inventoried and set on the counter. They will fit, and it will involve the precise placement of eight to ten nails for hanging. That is where it all stopped. Those are a lot of nails. If they aren't set correctly it will plague me for all of my time here. I moved onto other things.

The old and the newly installed.

The new floor register for the bathroom arrived and was installed. The vent is in the middle of the floor where it is stepped on and in socks or barefoot the vents and lever are painful. The fancier flat, meant to be walked on registers have been in my Amazon cart for a month being bumped by other items. 

Yesterday, the 4" by 8" size dropped in price from $14 to $9 and I pounced. The new color is a bit dark for the floor, but it will be great not shredding my feet anymore.  The laundry room and kitchen vents are a different size and those units are still in the cart waiting for a sale.  

The search resumed for costuming for the Friday dress rehearsal and dance performance on Saturday. Rifling through under the bed storage boxes, plastic tubs in the spare rooms and finally the drawer of everyday leggings and base layers yielded the skeleton print leggings. The sleeves and gloves that complete the skeleton look are still in hiding. Ugh. On to Plan B. A search through Amazon yielded ideas and the huge temptation to buy stuff. Some long velvet cloaks were on sale at great discounts with delivery promised tomorrow. Before hitting the button to buy, the several costume boxes and closets were reviewed again with a different mindset. Graduation gowns and caps. Ballet tutus and long net skirts. Mermaid costume. Red Riding Hood. Various capes. Greek toga. Many long and flouncy skirts. Several boxes of hats. 

By the end of the afternoon, the dress form was dressed in clothing already owned. A floral top, vinyl vest, black skirt plus a ruffled net overskirt, coin belt, and tiny clip-on hat with ribbons and pearls are major contenders. 

A blessing in a pill pack.

In addition to mostly conquering the costume, I realized the worst discomforts of the past several weeks had largely subsided. I hadn't sat with the ice pack for hours and had been spared the many potential side effects that kept me in the house. There was no nausea, vomiting, heartburn, headache, dizziness, trouble sleeping, appetite change, increased sweating, or acne (probably too early to tell on that one). Apparently the prescription that relieves inflammation really works. Modern science and medicine are pretty cool. 

random thoughts - Day 2,038 (Wednesday) - doctored

There was an excited call from Mom this morning. I answered the phone and she said "look out the window!" I looked out the front bay window, which is my primary view from the living room and saw nothing in the street. When she said "there are six deer!" it clicked she was in her living room which faces the trees behind our houses. The deer were walking and leaping over fallen trees behind my house and weaving through the wooded area with their white tails at attention. 

These are the first deer I've seen here. Last week there was a coyote crossing the street. All I need are  an owl, a fox, and a shed snake skin in the front yard and it will feel like my house in Tennessee. 

At the pine and pain center.

The spine and pain center office visit was this afternoon. I spent most of the morning sitting on the couch icing the neck and shoulder and it felt better today than in the past three weeks. Stuff hurt, just not as much and with another new flavor. Today's addition to the repertoire is prolonged tingling in my forearm and hand, especially in the ring finger. I have never been so highly attuned to every inch of my arm and shoulder as I have lately. 

The doctor thinks it's a pinched nerve and wants me to have an x-ray and/or MRI, but whatever problem caused the phones and systems to be out (since Sunday, I was told) continues and it couldn't be set up today because of it. He put in an order for physical therapy, which also couldn't be scheduled. He said the problem sometimes resolves itself in two to twelve weeks, and I said if it drags out to twelve weeks, I will throw myself from the roof before then. There is an appointment for a follow-up in six weeks.

Luckily, the steroidal prescription the shoulder doctor ordered last week had been waiting for me at the pharmacy. Today's doctor was prepared to prescribe the same thing. When the ortho ordered the script it was presented as "hey let's try this just in case" instead of a "this should help" situation. I'll take meds with good reason, but there have been enough reactions to meds that I'm not comfortable when it's "what the heck, let's give it a whirl." There was never a text from the pharmacy it was ready for pickup and I blew it off. The memories of the rash from my scalp to the soles of my feet (sulfa) and the chest pains (naproxen) are still a bit too vivid. 

While picking up last week's prescription today, the pharmacy tech told another customer that the prescription orders from the hospital and its affiliated groups were coming in erratically due to the communications issue. 

Fingers are crossed for luck that the improvement felt today isn't a false alarm. There are six tablets waiting for me in the morning, then five for Friday and decreasing each day for six days. Of course, if I had checked on the prescription a week ago, the regimen would be done by now and I might be feeling better. Live and learn. 

random thoughts - Day 2,037 (Tuesday) - hanging

Once upon a time, I married and moved from Massachusetts to Tennessee. I cancelled my auto registration and insurance policy, registered the car in Tennessee and the insurance policy was done with the agent my husband had used for years. 

A month or two after moving, there was a letter from the Massachusetts bank at which I had closed all my accounts, seeking a payment on an overdraft line of credit for the closed checking account. The cancelled auto insurance policy had submitted an automatic bill to the old checking account, which was paid despite the account being closed. The zero balance triggered the automatic overdraft protection and I received a bill for payment. Despite all my careful preparations before leaving the state, things still went sideways thanks to that automatic bill payment situation on a closed account. It took months to get it sorted, and that is why I refuse to let my utilities and loan bills go straight to the bank for automatic payments. 

Fast forward to now. After the bank merger and career-derailing layoff, I have chosen to divorce my financial accounts from the former employer and go with a local credit union. Petty? Maybe. So far, the exercise has taken about as long as a marital divorce. 

Before the merger and my unemployment I opened new accounts and over the summer I began setting up the payment accounts in the credit union's bill pay program. Mostly it's been okay. The process works for me because the amounts aren't always the same and sometimes there are errors. Entering monthly payments into the bill pay system flags differences for me. If it was all on autopay, I probably wouldn't catch it as quickly or at all (probably what the companies are counting on). 

For the past two months, my Verizon bill was withdrawn from my new checking account at the new credit union in a timely manner (as directed by me).  And for those two months, the payment has not been posted to my cell phone account. The first month I was alerted to the issue by a text declaring my payment was late. This time, I was on high alert, hawkishly monitoring the checking account withdrawals and visiting the account sites to verify the payments (yet another new hobby). Things seemed normal with the cable, electric, and car loan all working as expected. Today, I checked the cell phone account to verify the payment was made on Friday (before the due date which fell on Sunday). Yes to the funds being withdrawn, but no to them being applied to my cell account. Again.

Armed with the credit union confirmation number and proof of payment letter, I called Verizon to check on the situation and ask if there is in error in the payment instructions or some other problem. They don't show receiving the payment and claim everything is working fine on their end. The Verizon rep tried to sell me on auto-payments, but the major screw up with the insurance company, closed checking account, and overdraft protection soured me on that method forever. Then she tried to sell me on paying though their app, but setting up all the bills for online bill pay is much easier at one site than visiting individual apps for each stupid account. I would greatly prefer that we resolve the problem involving the payments that have already been made so it doesn't happen again. 

The cell rep offered to connect to the credit union and I thought they were going to have some tech talk, and suddenly I was on the line with the credit union rep who claims everything works great on their end and the payment was sent. So here were are. The two companies claim things are working great, the money is deducting from my checking account, it's not posting to my cell account and I'll probably be assessed another late fee, and nobody but me seems interested in figuring out what is causing it to go wrong after working just swell for the past nine years. After 45 minutes on the phone this morning, there are still no answers. Super fun times. 

To heap on more phone aggravation because clearly I am a glutton for punishment, I called the administrator of the former employer's former 401k plan. I still need to know what action is needed from me to roll my account over now that the plan has been dissolved. It was the second telephone attempt after an email went ignored. I was hanging on hold for 15 minutes and then hung up (just like the last time).

I looked up the info to call an oil company, but then realized they might ask how much oil is in the tank to plan a delivery. That info nugget required a trip outside to check the gauge and then when I came back inside I got sidetracked making a soup broth with vegetable scraps from the freezer and chopping fresh broccoli and carrots and mushrooms and forgot about calling until it was too late. Oops. Maybe tomorrow.

Newly placed microwave.

After 2.5 months with no microwave oven, I finally bought one, which delivered today. Although the kitchen feels roomy in general, the counter space and low-ish cabinet heights are still a challenge. The microwave is about a half-inch too wide for the small counter next to the fridge where it would block access to the built in jar opener under the cabinet. The whole kitchen needed rearranging to accommodate the microwave which I was afraid of and one reason for procrastinating the purchase. 

The cutting board/prep area is now closer to the stove. The toaster oven moved to where I thought the microwave might go. The microwave is opposite the refrigerator and there is no longer a place to the left of the sink to set the handwash dishes and pots and pans to drain. Nothing seems easy. It will probably change in a couple days again as I try to live with it. 

On the bright side, at least the nightmares spawned from the over the range built-in microwave at the last house can be banished. Every time a bowl of soup was removed, I worried about getting a face full of scalding liquid while lowering it to the counter from above eye level. It will be worth the cramped counter space to have eliminated that very real possibility. 

random thoughts - Day 2,036 (Monday) - housebound

The departure from the cozy warm bed has been increasingly difficult with each passing morning. Today, the neck and shoulder muscles were cramped and screaming, but no worries, because in a few hours I would be at my appointment at the spine and pain center. I imagined what might happen after the exam and pictured the possibility of a fancy foam neck brace. If it makes things feel better I will embrace that accessory like fine jewels. 

The coffee was started. The super hot, extra long shower was taken. The very unexpected text arrived at 8:21, announcing that my appointment was cancelled and I should contact the office to reschedule (no contact info included). 

So there I was, in pain (still), now searching online for a phone number for the office to get some information about the sudden and mysterious cancellation. The office called me last week based on the referral from the orthopedic office and I didn't have a card or phone number noted, so I was scrolling through a surprisingly long list of unlabeled local phone numbers in the "recent calls" tab. When I finally found a number on the office's website and got through, I was told the phones were out or systems weren't up (it wasn't clear exactly what happened) and they had to cancel the day's bookings. I cried. Just a little. It couldn't be helped and it helped nothing.

Comfy pants.

Later in the morning, the office's scheduling person called to set up another appointment. Every day for a week, the carrot on the stick that kept me going was the countdown to today's appointment and the hope of a solution. Now, it's been extended to Wednesday. I can do this. I hope.

Comfort was sought. The super soft fleece pants with little penguins in scarves were chosen. They are the officially designated "no intention of leaving the house" pants. The ice pack was pressed into it's daily service for stints on the shoulder and neck.

With it being a holiday, there seemed to be some confusion over the trash pickup. Only a couple houses on the street had rolled the bins to the curb and I followed the majority and didn't roll mine out. Around 11:30, the Waste Management truck rumbled along the far side of the street. It was a quick trip with most of the barrels not out. I sprang to action (still in the not leaving the house pants and house slippers) and rolled mine out before the return loop for my side of the street. Then I called next door to Mom's to let them know there was definitely trash pickup today. Whew.

Windy.

The rest of the day was steeped in watching Netflix, eating everything in sight, sitting with the ice pack, and watching the wind whip through the trees and trying (unsuccessfully) to capture the wildness in a photo. Two loads of laundry were somehow done in between the lounging about. Miracles do happen. 

random thoughts - Day 2,035 (Sunday) - bargain outlet

We were promised rain and it arrived. It has been accompanied by some wind, which had the rain slamming against different sides of the house. Luckily, the errands were done earlier in the day after dance class.

There was a trip to Fitchburg for a visit to the recently opened Ollie's Bargain Outlet. The grand opening is this week, but there was a soft opening going on. It's in the former Big Lots location, and shortly after noon today, the parking lot was busy. 

The place was packed with merchandise and felt a bit like the love child of Ocean State Job Lots and the much-beloved, now-defunct Big Lots. The front of the store was loaded with Christmas decorations. Like Ocean State, there is a large area in the back of the store with stacks of flat area rugs. Like both of the other retailers, there is clothing, but it was not a very impressive assortment. There was an oddly large number of toilet paper stands that can store a few rolls in the open base with the active roll on top.  There was a large section of books which I avoided like the plague, having recently moved approximately 10 tons of my own books which are still waiting to be organized. Book buying and I are on a break for now.

Bargain outlet score.

The grocery area was heavy on potato chips and salty snacks. There was a spice section and jelly and jam assortment that rivals Ocean State. The rest of the grocery section wasn't that impressive, except for the major score of a 30 ounce bags of dried cranberries for $6.49. I'll probably regret not buying more than one.

At checkout, my cart had just a few items, and most were because I didn't want to stand in the checkout queue for just a single decorative soap dispenser ($1.99). On my second loop through groceries when it was less congested with carts I added a can of corn, three packages of potato gnocchi, a can of diced clams, two pounds of jasmine rice, and one or two other items. I got out of there spending only $17 for nine items which felt like victory. It felt less triumphant when I got home and discovered several packages of gnocchi already in the pantry that has fallen into disorganization and disarray. That didn't take long, but my pastime lately is grocery shopping and not grocery displays.

The store was full of adult couples loudly discussing their shopping items like they were determining the fate of the world. One guy wase badgering his companion with the repeated question, "What did you come here for?" I wanted to jump in and say "Dude, chill the heck out. The store is new here, do any of us even know what they have or where to find it?" I held my tongue and continued my careful squeeze through the too-narrow aisles. You can barely squeak two carts through the aisles without crashing and it's like they set up to maximize the display space while creating the perfect environment for fisticuffs. 

random thoughts - Day 2,034 (Saturday) - dancing ghouls

Icing the shoulder before the apocalypse.

Much of the day was spent lounging about the house, icing the shoulder, and eating soup, and then it was time for makeup and dressing for an event. In October, we temporarily shed the Salaamati World Dance Troupe name and our dances to middle eastern music and become the Dancing Ghouls for guest appearances performing at various Halloween events. Townsend's Haunted Trail was tonight, and next week we are at Pepperell's Fright Night. 

The theme tonight was "apocalypse" and we dressed with our interpretations of it. Costume elements included leather harnesses, chain maille, camouflage, military boots, fake fur, and earthy makeup tones. Like in the past, the younger set jumped in and danced along with us for bits of "Thriller," "Monster Mash," and "Time Warp,"  and as always,  we love it. A couple of our dances were designed for people to be able to jump in and follow along.

The weather was comfortable in the 50s, and I got hot while dancing. I dressed  prepared for autumn chill and had long johns under my camo pants, plus two base layer shirts, a merino wool sweater, a fake fur jacket, and a Finnish lambs wool lined military hat. After each set the hat and jacket came off. 

Line dancing at the Haunted Trail event.

Before we danced, while the vendor tents and food trucks were kicking off the night, the music was heavy on Kidz Bop versions of songs. We danced three sets, spread out over the event to music we provided (not Kidz Bop). After our last set, the DJ changed the kid's music to a rave vibe. We cut loose on the pavement with our "Monster Mash" glow sticks. Two little kids, one dressed in a stripey burglar outfit and the other as bag of money came out and danced with us. Two vendors dressed in cow costumes danced on the far edge of the pavement near their tent. It was fun. After the mini-rave, it was line dances with the ever-popular "Cupid Shuffle" and a couple other line dances. "Cotton Eye Joe" was playing with dancers tearing up the pavement as we made our way to the cars. 

Exiting the event got crazy. We had been told to park on the lawn behind the library and senior center. Normally, we had been allowed to park on the pavement behind the buildings. When we were leaving, there was an abandoned tailgate party set up with lawn chairs blocking part of the grassy space travel lane. Tweens and teens were running around the darkened parking area. The exit, marked by orange cones, was closed off by a couple of vehicles that were parked between the cones. It took some maneuvering to back up, turn around, and go to the far side of the lawn to find some pavement and I was glad I wasn't the driver. 

Next week is our second Halloween event. Two weeks later, we are scheduled to appear in a belly dance showcase. In early December, we are dancing in a belly dance fundraiser. It's a busy couple months. But for right now, it's back to the ice pack.

random thoughts - Day 2,033 (Friday) - rough and light

Many sprays, many
evil tiny zip ties.

It was a rough ride getting out of bed because the shoulder was especially bold and cruel. It was straight to the couch in my pajamas and fluffy purple bathrobe with my new bestie the frozen gel pack perched on my shoulder. The look is a combination of Barney the purple dinosaur meets Quasimodo. There was a brief break after the icing and then was an extra long, extra hot shower. After that, it felt better than when it started. For a while anyway.

The costume for the apocalypse themed Halloween event on Saturday keeps changing and the pile of clothing dumped on the table is growing. The weather is a part of the vacillation. Planning a costume for belly dancing outdoors in the cold of after dark while adhering to an event theme is kind of hard. It's now at the point where I hate every single idea and component I have tossed around my cranium and onto the table. 

There was a trip to Aldi mid afternoon for a short list of provisions. In the car, while checking for my quarter for the cart, I discovered I didn't have my wallet, and was immediately back on the road to home. This was much better than if I had gone to Hannaford to use my $8 off a $40 order and made the discovery at the checkout. That would have been embarrassing.

After supper, I went back out to Aldi, this time with the means to pay for the goods in hand. I brought in only one shopping bag because the list was five items, but going down every aisle and eyeballing everything ended up with an inflated cartful. At checkout, it was evident by the total I should have just gone to Hannaford to use the cart coupon that expires Tuesday.

Assembled and lit.

Instead of sitting on the couch watching Netflix shows, the floor lamp that arrived from Amazon today was assembled. The pole was prewired and it took about two minutes to screw the four pole sections together then the base and the topper. Then it got hard and time consuming. The topper has about 50 screw in elements with sprays of clear beads on wires that the LED lights shine through. Each spray is bound with the tiniest zip tie ever seen and it took forever to remove the zips to release the first 20 sprays. The everyday scissors got a workout until I figured out a nail clipper might be easier, which made the screwing in of each spray while tied also easier. 

The floor lamp was finally finished and tested and the nine LED bulbs are wicked bright. It looks like a dandelion puff and set in the corner of the dining room, it's a brilliant supplement to the very dim ceiling fixture that needs replacing because I don't like it. It also may need relocation because it isn't centered and that makes me nuts. But first things first, and those first things are what I can tackle on my own like light assembly of small furniture pieces and lamps. 

random thoughts - Day 2,032 (Thursday) - more again

After a couple summery days, it's back to more seasonable temperatures and the heat is back on. This morning I noticed at least half the floor registers were closed and that was rectified. That was the easy part of the day and after the tiny victory it was discoveries and mishaps.

First, I noticed the date on the desk calendar and realized the car insurance payment, due yesterday, had not been paid because I couldn't enter it into my online banking bill pay and then I forgot. Hopefully, the punishment for one day of tardiness isn't too harsh. 

There were a couple interesting jobs posted since Wednesday and the application for the second one required the level of work where I usually say "screw it" and bail. There were the usual customizing tweaks to the resume and drafting of the cover letter and then it got annoying. The application wanted a URL to a portfolio, which was when I realized my website hadn't been updated with the latest samples because I couldn't get into it the last time I tried. 

Personal website work is done seldom enough that it is a brand new adventure every time. The free website time period expired and there was a $149 fee to be able to touch the pages at all. It's on a old platform that needs to be updated, but when I try to update it, there is a message it can't be done. Awesome. On another screen there is a message not to worry about it, it's been "hardened" and is all set.

The screens to update the content were different than the last time, which is about the only constant. It took 1.5 hours to add a link to one new file and revise the order of items on one page because there is no way to highlight text and perform a cut/paste operation. No cut/paste tools, and the traditional Ctrl C and Ctrl V commands don't work because you can't choose the text to perform the operation on. The best I could do was use the tool to duplicate all the content on the page so it appeared twice, then strategically delete sections to rebuild the order how I wanted it. Ridiculous. Time consuming. I wanted to cry. I have no idea what I clicked on at one point, but the text turned to Finnish. No lie. Finnish. Which I recognized thanks to my past Finnish lessons. It was a good chance to yell "perkele!" the all-purpose Finnish cuss word. Somehow, after a lot of swearing and hitting esc and undo, it reverted back to English. I think the next time the domain, hosting, and website renewals come due I'll just delete the whole frigging thing because it's not worth the headaches. 

After the website aggravation, vegging in front of the TV seemed like the perfect form of relaxation because physical activity like cleaning the carport gutter or sanding the dresser are still off the table. And just like one month ago (September 8 to be exact), the cable was out. Not totally out. There was a a flash and then a black screen. Resetting the box produced a welcome screen, then the black screen. The app for troubleshooting wasn't super helpful (shocker!) and claimed there were no issues. Once it understood there was indeed an issue,  it took 1.5 hours for it to be resolved. If my shoulder didn't hurt so much, I might have punched a wall, but that might have ended in a broken hand, so I guess that was a good thing. 

As if all that wasn't enough fun, I had to call about the brand new prescription plan I was enrolled in on August 1st, which I learned via a letter in yesterday's mail is being discontinued as of December 31. WTF? Why would you open a plan in August that is being phased out in a few months? No wonder people hate insurance companies so much. The person I needed to speak with was unavailable and a message was left, but I won't hold my breath waiting for a callback. 

Did I make it out to the real world to get cash to cover the gap during the big banking conversion this weekend when my current debit card is rendered useless and until Tuesday when the new one will work? Nope. Hopefully I can get to that tomorrow. I had intended to close all the accounts at the former employer, but only the savings accounts were closed and there are still a checking account and 401k to be dealt with. Life is one big, endless chore lately. Every night, I fall asleep to the wish/lie "tomorrow will be better." 

Tall trees behind the house.

Tonight, as the sun was low, I went to the front yard and stared at the sky and the pine tree towering over the house that has blanketed the back yard in needles. It was calming for a minute, but then my neck hurt from looking up and it was back to the couch and the ice pack and the tennis balls and feeling like a broken toy. At least the cable was working again.

Tomorrow will be better.