random thoughts – Day 1,728 – (Monday) – surprise!

Some days are full of surprises and today was certainly one of them. There was a highly unusual early morning text message from work referencing a message we needed to read and an all-team online meeting at 8:45. This never happens. This did not feel good.

It was a remote day for me, and I considered changing things up and heading in to the office. It would have required changing out of jeans and into dress pants and the shoes that go with them and grabbing some lunch to take with me. That might have worked in the wedge of time available, but suddenly my colleagues and I were involved in a flurry of text messages with each other and I was simultaneously logging into the system to see the referenced message and there were more texts and then it was too late to change clothes, get to the office on time, and be logged in for the meeting. I stayed put and sat tight.

The news, which is now public, is that the independent, community bank I work for is being acquired by a larger, regional community bank. They are a lot like us, just operating in a different but adjacent geography.

It’s shocking. Stressful. Depressing. Exciting, but maybe not for me. I'm trying to keep an open mind. I can't decide if it's a blessing or a curse that I’ve already been through this once before. Some will come out of it with jobs and mostly unscathed and others won’t be so lucky. 

There have been assurances provided about some areas of the bank. The assumption from some of us on my team is that every back-office role already has a currently staffed counterpart in the acquiring organization. This is what happened the last time I rode this crazy ride and ended up leaving the field for years.

So that was the shadow that hung over the entire day. It will be interesting. Which is not always a fun thing, but most likely won’t be dull.

Salmon, broccoli, onions.

To cheer myself up and exert some control over something, I cooked. A delicious and reasonably healthy supper of salmon, broccoli, and onions was prepared. It worked, and I felt in control of the few minutes it took to cook and eat.

Soon, I found myself stress eating creamy peanut butter on Ritz crackers, followed by more peanut butter straight from the jar. The fleeting sense of control from earlier was gone. The false comfort of the peanut butter didn't last for very long, either. It rarely does.