On December 16, I was awakened in the early morning hours by the annoying chirp of the Kidde smoke and carbon monoxide alarm outside my bedroom. I waited patiently for the nearby hardware store to open and bought batteries. Once replaced, the sound that occurred every 30 seconds and made me want to smash things stopped. It was bliss.
Today, exactly one week
later, the frigging thing was chirping again and woke me up at 5:00. I was not
a happy camper with pillows over my head in an attempt to block the sound. Stress
mounted over the fact that it’s two days before Christmas and guests are coming in one day. I opened the hard-wired unit and found the manufactured date. It’s October 2015. As in, ten years and two
months ago. My best updated guess was that it was the chirp of death. My burning question
was, how did this thing pass the mandatory state fire inspection in July?
This was the day I
intended to calmly finish baking the sweets, start the food preparation, and
clean the house. After an hour of the chirp from hell delivered at 30-second intervals, I
was fired up. An email was sent to the Fire Chief seeking clarification on what the inspection conducted
by their department in July actually certifies. I tried to be civil in tone, but it was
barely 6:00 a.m., the chirping was six feet from the desk where the
computer lives, and I was tired and most definitely not calm. Kiki was hiding under the bed.
Shopping for a new detector was
definitely not on any of the several to-do lists. I was about five seconds away
from ripping the entire thing out of the wall, wiring and all. The helpful
neighbor suggested changing the battery and I was skeptical because it was only
one week old, but ok. It stopped the noise.
The Fire Chief responded
to my email with a number I could reach him at and we talked. I learned that because
the inspection was in July, technically, the unit was in compliance with an
October expiration. My annoyance transferred to the seller’s realtor for not extending
the courtesy of changing the unit in July instead of leaving it with three months of
expected life. In contrast, my realtor made sure every unit in the house I sold
was replaced to ensure compliance and a smooth inspection, and to save the
buyers of my old house the aggravation I endured this morning. The Fire Chief
also mentioned that if the backup battery is draining in a week, there could be
an issue with the power supply. Super cool. That’s what I really wanted for Christmas –
to find an electrician.
Thanks to the chirping and related stress, texts, and conversations, the morning list to-do was cast aside. Yesterday, before the
chirping, the day’s schedule had been altered to accommodate another dental
appointment. The crown came in from the lab early and I was invited to come
today for installation and to and have another $883 extracted from my life even sooner. Good times. So
much for a calm day baking at home.
The appointment was
supposed to be quick and easy, maybe 30 minutes. No numbing needles, remove the
temporary crown, and install the new one. Easy peasy. Except the assistant had
trouble getting the temporary crown off and when it finally came off, a chunk
of the new filling that took two hours in the chair a week ago came out with it.
She bolted from the space and returned with the dentist. Apparently, the new
cement she used last week is extra strong. It was totally on brand for this year
of never-ending whiskey-tango-foxtrot. It just needs to stop.
The topical numbing stuff
came out, the needle came out, the drill came out. Then there was a lot of
fussing to get the crown set. When I was given a mirror to admire the work
before the final cementing, I pointed out it looked like it was set crooked. More
adjustments happened.
After 1.5 hours, I was
finally on my way, with instructions to not eat anything for the next 1.5 hours
and to be careful with hard/crunchy foods for 24 hours.
Food preparation progress focused on baking the noodle kugel, which is made of egg noodles with applesauce, grated
apple, crushed pineapple, and eggs. It’s a versatile food that can be served hot
or cold, as a side to a meal or as a dessert. I love the stuff and hadn’t made
it in years. Mummu’s recipe for kielbasa, a family favorite with a sauce of
brown sugar, vinegar, and ketchup was also prepared. Tomorrow list is won ton cups
with sausage and cheese and assembly of the sweet bologna rollups. 
Kielbasa and kugel.
The day’s reduced kitchen shift resulted in the removal of a couple planned recipes from the Christmas Eve menu. The cookies that would have been baked overnight tonight in the oven are now cut from the list because I just couldn't. So are the Mexican mocha balls.
In the next few days, I can enjoy the extreme joy of shopping for new smoke and carbon monoxide detectors. Can’t hardly
wait.
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